INT: Top Yacht studio, usual three presenters, studio audience, various boats hanging behind etc
Clarkson: Before the final clip from our Less is More Challenge it's time to put a Sailing Star in our Standard Laser. This week we have a legend of offshore sailing - ladies and gentleman, Mike Golding!
May and Hammond appear instead
Clarkson: What are you doing here? Where is Mike?
Hammond: There's been a little hiccup
May: Well he was about to start out when a fluke burst of lightening hit a tree which then crashed onto his car
Hammond: He tried to call for a cab but then really unluckily a meteorite hit the local telephone exchange.
May: So he ran 5 miles to the nearest train station where due to a bizarre sequence of events involving goats and the overflow from a sewage works all trains were cancelled.
Clarkson: So he's not coming?
Hammon: No, he says sorry - next time!
Clarkson: Well, they don't call him the most unlucky sailor for nothing.