Captain JP's log

No frost-biting on Lake Geneva

2012-01-29T18:07:00.003Z

This was Lake Geneva yesterday and there was not a sail to be seen.

Though of course this being Geneva there are other things that can be done in winter, sports that also relate to H2O, sports that really need the cold.

Lake Geneva's Neptune

2012-01-26T20:59:00.002Z

This is the La Neptune, built in 1904 and still sailing on Lake Geneva.

She was originally used to transport sand and stones but is now available for charter. Apparently La Neptune has 3 sails with a total area of 275 square metres.

I think she uses a form of lateen rig as can be seen on this site.

Geneva's Jet d'Eau

2012-01-25T20:06:00.000Z

There's fast flowing water and then there's the Jet d'Eau.

Water leaves the nozzle at 200 km/h, driven by twin 500 kW turbines to reach 140 metres into the sky.

If the sun is out you can see a lovely rainbow:

Volvo re-start at Male

2012-01-23T18:17:00.000Z

So the Volvo Ocean Race's secret is out - the mystery rendezvous destination was Male in the Maldives. And that's not too far from the position calculated using their (lat, longs) and DTLs as in the figure above from back on the 18th of December.

Might have a re-start of my own and starting following the fleet's progress.

A dragon boat for year of the dragon

2012-01-23T18:05:00.001Z

It's the sisterhood boat, whose crew has included one ~~Kate Middleton~~, er, I mean, the Duchess of Cambridge.

The Boat Project

2012-01-22T14:39:00.002Z

As O'Docker correctly identified, yesterday's picture was of "The Boat Project".

This is an art installation / boat being constructed as part of the 2012 Cultural Olympiad from 1,200 pieces of wood donated by the public, each piece meaning something to the giver.

It might be the drums sticks of a band, the hairbrush from the father who worked at Pinewood Studios, parts of HMS Invincible, a cribbage board, teak packing board from China, fragments of Brighton's West Pier, part of Jimmy Hendrix's guitar ..... the list is nearly endless.

Together they tell a story, a patchwork quilt of wood of the people of Britain. The boat is at present unnamed but you can vote from a short list on the boat project's web site.

She'll be launched on the 7th May and then make her way along the south coast of England stopping at places like Brighton and Portsmouth before reaching London.

Picture puzzle: what boat?

2012-01-21T11:33:00.000Z

This isn't Buff either

2012-01-20T20:12:00.000Z

It's a bear on a stand up kayak of course!

What'd you mean, you've never seen one?

One rather wet bear to be honest, having just fallen in - probably thought it saw a salmon or something.

Its not Buff!

2012-01-20T14:21:00.000Z

G'day all! Buff Staysail here! Buff by name and Buff by nature!

Well due to circumstances beyond my control I was unable to get to the Buff stand at the 2012 London Boat Show but JP managed to get this picture and boy was I hacked off! I mean he doesn't even look a bit like me!

And as for that hat!!!

This is Buff Staysail, for real, signing off!

Pippa good; PIPA bad

2012-01-18T19:50:00.000Z

Piracy doesn't justify SOPA

2012-01-18T17:57:00.000Z

The acronym of the day is SOPA.

It's legislation being proposed in the US Congress to stop piracy, but while piracy - both real and online - is wrong the provisions in SOPA are unjustified, too broad and way too draconian.

It might come from the US but it could have a serious impact over here too - after all Blogger is owned by Google which is a US company.

More here on why its such a bad idea.

Hostage

2012-01-17T20:45:00.000Z

I'm sure there were many people saying "great you could be here" at the 2012 London Boat Show, but there were two people for whom that meant a lot more than just politeness.

Above are Paul and Rachel Chandler signing copies of their book Hostage, finally free from their terrible ordeal and safe back in blighty.

I had a brief chat with Rachel about their capture by Somali pirates and the motivation behind the re-arrangements of the VOR leg to Abu Dhabi. It must have been really awful - one of my greatest fears when travelling to Pakistan was kidnapping.

They are already planning their next voyage - to South America. I asked about Venezuela, having had a great time there, but it too has a bit of a piracy problem.

Its truly great that they are free and able to come to the Boat Show and I'm looking forward to reading my copy of their book.

Crash

2012-01-17T14:33:00.000Z

Nope, this isn't JP after a night on the tiles, this is the crash dummy on board Yachting Monthly's Crash Test Boat that was on display at the 2012 London Boat Show.

Looked a right old mess, but not surprising given what its been through.

There were dancing girls

2012-01-16T20:57:00.000Z

So there were some for the opening, but if they were around later I didn't see them.

Though I suspect I was hanging around the wrong bits of the show i.e. not the Princess and Sunseeker stands.

Friggin' in the riggin'

2012-01-16T20:20:00.000Z

One of things to do at the 2012 London Boat Show was an opportunity to get a feel for the high life - or to be more accurate, to climb the rigging.

And they didn't have any old square rigger but the actual foretopmast of HMS Victory herself.

I had one of those "must get round to doing that" moments and then moved on, never to return. Nelson would not approve, being a great believer in seizing the day.

Though to be honest it wasn't that dramatic given the mast wasn't moving, there wasn't a breath of wind, nor rain or spray.

I think doing it for real would be much more interesting.

Sherlock and the Boat Show

2012-01-16T14:04:00.002Z

I was going to follow up my brief post on the boat show with another (short frequent postings being the thing nowadays) but the final episode of Sherlock started, and that demanded don't blink levels of attention.

And a cracker it was too. I won't spoil it if you haven't yet seen it (enjoy) but my suspicions were that if Moriarty could [deleted] then he surely could also [deleted]. And as for the ending, well the internet rumour mill is on overdrive but I agreed that Sherlock could have [deleted], [deleted] and then [deleted]: [deleted] is clearly key.

Anyhow less cryptically, the great Holmes is famous for noticing the dog that didn't bark and one of the interesting things about the boat show was who wasn't there this time who were in the past. Quite a lot of no-shows and the halls felt a lot emptier of stands and people.

For example there was no On Deck Sailing for the annual wouldn't it be great to do Antigua Week conversation. They probably got fed up with time wasters who each year would come up and say "wouldn't it be great to do Antigua Week", drink a glass of bubbly and then disappear.

So no free bubbly and no dancing girls.

But what was there? Well to answer that question would make this post long, and as we all know, frequent short posts are the thing now a days.

Later, guys!

The London Boat Show connection

2012-01-15T17:19:00.001Z

Yesterday's mystery picture was a display of the wares from the Mayfair Gallery. What, I asked, is the connection between the Mayfair Gallery and sailing?

It was in a way a trick question, because my honest answer was that I didn't know. Hence my surprise when I saw it at the London Boat Show, which I went to yesterday.

But obviously someone thinks there is a connection. If a gazzilionaire turns up to buy a $$ million Princess or Sunseeker they might want to decorate it with some vases or something. Or indeed a Rolls as in the pic above (taken with an iPhone so alas not a great photo).

To be honest I can't see your typical member of the 0.01% joining the masses at Excel in Docklands, but apparently the super yacht segment of the market is booming.

Unlike much of the rest of the show that felt rather anaemic, as will post on shortly.

What's the sailing connection?

2012-01-14T20:21:00.001Z

No, its not the picture in the background, its something else.

You don't have to read

2012-01-13T21:00:00.001Z

You can just look at the pictures.

These photos are cropped square shaped as per Instagram.

There's a whole planet in the last one.

Reprieve for the Putney River Bus

2012-01-12T20:01:00.001Z

Some good news for the new year - the Putney River bus has had a reprieve. Due to contract re-negotiation brouhaha (see here) the commuter river bus between Putney and central London was due to end along with 2011.

However fortunately an alternative bid was submitted and just before Christmas it was announced that Complete Pleasure Boats Ltd had been awarded an operating licence.

They will be running the Henley (above in autumnal morning mists) and Viscount boats providing commuters with free tea, coffee and toast!

Huzzah, hurrah!

p.s. The news story referenced is on the BYM web site, and Tillerman might like this image on their home page, which is from the Laser Masters 2011

A January sail, not the January sales

2012-01-11T11:48:00.002Z

About a year ago my sailing chum Tristan, aka the Natural Navigator, invited me for a weekend sailing, but in the end the boat was covered about a foot deep with snow so we went for a walk (trans. hike) instead.

Last weekend there was another invite but this time the weather was much more favourable so we had no trouble getting on the water for a great sail to St. Catharine's Point.

Sailors like to know the facts, so here goes:
Temperatures: 10ish - we didn't need gloves
Wind: NW - W, force 4 - 7
Sea state: some swell from the SW, especially when wind against tide (see pic above)

There was no rain, let alone snow or sleet, and yet we were pretty much the only boat out there.

On the way back we saw Jupiter and Venus, plus a near full moon, useful for navigating up a wiggly channel with only a few lit buoys.

Fab.

Send Buff to Miami!

2012-01-10T20:13:00.001Z

G'day all! Buff Staysail here! Buff by name and Buff by nature!

Well no doubt that Puma deal was a bit of a surprise but it got yours truly thinking about the Volvo Ocean Race schedule and one question in particular: is Abu Dhabi really the most Buff-worthy of the destination ports?

After a bit of honest soul-searching the answer was no. For an Ozzie from the Gold Coast one city above all called out to me - Miami!! (*)

I can just see ol' Buff returning to his old haunts from the days of the Celebrity Yacht Race, enjoying life like that Will Smith song!!

So how about it, any super-sponsors out there?

This is Buff Staysail, bag packed and ready!!

(*) or Sanya, Aukland, Itajai & Lisbon

Buff supports Puma!

2012-01-09T20:10:00.000Z

G'day all! Buff Staysail here! Buff by name and Buff by nature!

Thanks to Tillerman for pointing out that the previous post could be misinterpreted. Yours truly is a huge fan of all things Puma-ic and has spotted one amazing opportunity for Puma - or indeed any other forward looking media aware sailing organisation.

Look at my track record - word craftsman extraordinaire. But of course today's multi-media facebooked flickred twitpic needs more - yes a picture tells a thousand words, or of course in my case maybe a bit less, say a hundred or so.

So how about this: blogger, journo legend Buff Staysail together with a photographer - but who? This is where a light went off in ol' Buff's head - how about O'Docker? He's the guru on lunar photography, photoshopping, you name it

What a team - Buff Staysail and O'Docker, let loose in the bars and taverns of Abu Dhabi!!!

Bring it on!!

This is Buff Staysail, back on the bounce, waiting for that call!!

Buff Staysail boycotts Puma!

2012-01-09T17:03:00.001Z

G'day all! Buff Staysail here! Buff by name and Buff by nature!

Of all the bleeding cheek! I mean, jeez, what does a blogger have to do to get ahead? There was I, feet up enjoying a nice cold one when I read over on Proper Course that Puma have paid for ten bloggers to be flown out to Abu Dhabi - and NOT included yours truly!!

Instead they've chosen a bunch of fashionistas that worry about things like looking cool - jeez, I'm lost for words.

I'm into fashion too - Buff is known for his style!! Didn't they see my America's Cup World Series TV show???? Didn't they know that I'm already a "Volvo Circumnavigator"????

I blame JP. If he hadn't gone around calling top-notch TV shows like Three men do X as a "yawn-fest" or saying the DTLs in the most recent Volvo leg as "meaningless" this would never have happened.

I wouldn't put it past him (or O'Docker) to have mentioned that phone hacking incident.

Jeez, to think I could be now modelling swimming shorts!! Or mixing it with Hepburn!!!

That's it, I've had enough. I'm not going to buy Puma gear let alone go to the gym three times a week. A man has his respect you know.

This is Buff Staysail - over AND out!!

JP goes sailing

2012-01-08T19:57:00.000Z

Buff's kayaking joke

2012-01-06T18:09:00.000Z

G'day all! Buff Staysail here! Buff by name and Buff by nature!

Well JP has stepped away from the keyboard leaving me in charge so how about this for a joke:

There were two paddlers out in a kayak and they were feeling a bit cold. So one of them suggested they light a fire in the kayak. Not surprisingly the kayak caught fire and sank. Which only goes to show that...

........ you can't have your kayak and heat it.

Geddit!!!

Buff's review of 2011

2012-01-05T21:30:00.003Z

G'day all! Buff Staysail here! Buff by name and Buff by nature!

Well that was a cracker of year for ol' Buff. Forget about JP's 2011 and have a listen to this!

Buff's tactical head has been shining for real with biz ideas a plenty. In just one year I came up with an America's Cup syndicate, property speculation, 3 tier competition services and Buff's Brilliant Buoys (TM)!!!

What's more I've seen the way the world works, no ninny me, and how wheeling dealer types must engage with those politicos, like. Remember the Mandatory Laser Bill? Well that gave me the biggestish idea ever - Buff for President!!!

Well alas that didn't pan out, but then Buff the Man has grown this year, you know, like spiritually. My quest for enlightenment brought not just the horoscopes for 2011 but also shown the need for a Taru of my own (still searching if there are any lovely ladies out there).

Of course Buff the sailing expert was in great demand. I gave my top tips on navigation and discovered I'd already done a "Volvo circumnavigation" of Australia (beaut). Maybe because of that I presented the world famous and totally epic Buff Staysail America's Cup World Series TV Show!!!!

Don't think there's any need to go on about the boat show incident, the Syrian lesbian allegation or the phone hacking scandal.

What can 2012 bring? I think its going to be XXXX Gold mate!!

Geddit!! Olympic year and all that. Oh, and any major news corporation looking for a legendary sporting journo to cover the games, just email JP. He'll know which bar I can be found in.

This if Buff Staysail, ready and waiting!!!

Blog review of 2011

2012-01-03T21:47:00.003Z

It wasn't an easy year, what with a death in the family and the riots in London. There was also not just one but two periods where work loads were excessive for weeks and weeks in a row.

But there were good moments too. Despite the riots London proved it was great with a wide range of culture from Gauguin to the Book of the Dead to Steve Reich's Drumming to Miro to theremin SF to Iain M. Banks to string quartet plus didgeridoo to Barber's Knoxville to the Proms to John Martin's Apocalypse (and sewage system) to Film to Wild Beasts to Swallows and Amazons.

Just check out what was packed into one day off in London.

There was of course one rather well publicised wedding.

Hmmm...... looks like there was more culture than boating. But I did get paddling on the river, go ice skating and race in the Fowey Classics (allegedly). We were "not bad" three times in a row - yeh!

This year is already promising much, with both the London 2012 Olympics and the Queens Diamond Jubilee, and I've been plotting options for sailing routes and destinations.

Above is the classic yacht Mikado which we beat at the Fowey Classics - one definitely good memory to take from last year.

Of course Buff's year was even better.......

Happy New Year 2012

2012-01-01T09:11:00.002Z

A lovely abstract for which the reality is as interesting: this is an image from the probe Cassini currently orbiting Saturn, as explained here.

After rowing to the pole, a rowing race across the Atlantic

2011-12-31T19:06:00.003Z

One last post to slip into 2011 with a seasonally chilly feel.

The three men yawn-fest might have disappointed but afterwards the iPlayer suggested I watch a documentary called "Rowing the Arctic" and that was a lot more interesting.

It described the expedition last summer to row to the North Pole, highlighting how global warming has reduced Arctic summer ice cover.

However it should be pointed out that in this case they meant the magnetic North Pole, and in particular the 1996 magnetic North Pole which was somewhere at the top of Canada.

You might remember the route as the one that the Top Gear team followed a few years ago in 4x4s, though they chose to drive in Spring when the ice is at its thickest.

In this case it was August when 6 rowers, explorers and Arctic specialists set out from Resolute Bay to row the 450 NM to 78.595°N 104.1983°W. After 28 days of hard work and battling ice and polar bears they made it.

Led by polar veteran Jock Wishart the crew included Mark Beaumont who you might have seen in the TV series The Man who Cycled the Americas.

Now Mark has just announced a new project - to try to beat the record for rowing the Atlantic, and cross in under 30 days. Given it took us on Ocean Wanderer 21 days sailing that seems very ambitious to me.

But then I haven't rowed to the North Pole, though I have just been ice skating again at the Natural History Museum, rather wobbly.

You have to start somewhere.

Three men yawn-fest goes to America

2011-12-30T10:33:00.001Z

I'm not sure how they do it. Ok, I can see technically how its done, but what's the key to unlocking the Beeb's purse to be paid to say the most mundane dialog on a series of rather nice boats.

Every year its the same, and the only difference is location. This time the three men were in east coast US, pottering down to NY for the flotilla to commemorate the 125th anniversary of the Statue of Liberty.

There is no edginess to it, apart from the setting-teeth-on-edge type. To make it interesting they could have wheeled on Newt Gringrich and sent him in a time machine to 1775 where he could have told George Washington "There is no such country as America and no such people as Americans" just as he said about the Palestinians.

There was this fictitious task that they must find a boat and then convince the owner to sail it down to NY the very next day. But given that the boats were the likes of the lightship Nantucket you'd have to be a GOP candidate not to realise this was a gigantic fix.

On the plus side there were cheerleaders:

They were rather good, there should be more cheerleaders in sailing programs. They did this routine about "give us a J, give us a P...." - no hang on, that's my imagination.

At the very, very start there was a very, very short clip of the three men actually sailing:

Sailing programs, after all, should actually have some sailing in them.

But there wasn't nearly enough: much better to instead watch on iPlayer a great Great Expectations.

Cathy and Heathcliff - lost on the moors!

2011-12-29T17:46:00.001Z

EXT: the moors where Wuthering Heights was filmed. Visibility is poor but improving: out of the mists come HEATHCLIFF and CATHERINE.

CATHERINE

Oh Heathcliff my love I fear that we have made a grievous error and are now lost upon these desolate moors! We shall die forsaken: what a terrible fate! But be comforted by the fact that we will be together, forever!

HEATHCLIFF

Alas it is worse than that - I will miss the footie!

CATHERINE

But what is this? A tree? Will it be a better signpost than those false rocks?

HEATHCLIFF

We must hurry though, the kick-off is mere minutes away.

So what can our heroes learn from this tree? Can you help them reach safety in time for Heathcliff to see the kick-off?

Wuthering Heights - Naturally

2011-12-28T10:42:00.001Z

EXT: Moors where they shot Wuthering Heights. Moody sky with dark clouds driven by a fierce wind.

CATHERINE

Heathcliff!

HEATHCLIFF

Cathy!

They run towards each other and embrace.

CATHERINE

Oh my beloved Heathcliff, what raptures it is to be in your strong arms, to feel protected against the harsh world alone with the wind and clouds for company, my love growing stronger, wrapping around your soul to gain the nourishment that mere food can not compare.....

Fade out, then fade into:

CATHERINE

...and so my beloved Heathcliff my love is as strong as those rocks whose countenance is so like your manly face engraved as it is into my heart, by spirits climb as a lark blown across the stormy sky....

Fade out (seems like we were a bit hasty). Lets try again and fade into:

CATHERINE

...my love, my only one, for whom I live, for whom my soul breaths, and without whom life itself meant nothing, to be with you is to be complete!!

Beat

HEATHCLIFF

And I think you're right fit, lass

Beat

CATHERINE

Oh alas, woe is upon us, for as we have been engrossed in our love a mist has descended, cutting us off, as even an island with two occupants upon a sea of heather! How are we to find our way home to Wuthering Heights?

HEATHCLIFF

But what is this? A path, bound by dry stone walls on either side! And 'tis good stone work that, nicely laid.

CATHERINE

Aye, maybe these two walls can aid us in our hour of need! Tell us your secrets, oh ancient stones: which way be west?

So readers, can you help our young lovers? Which of the two walls should be on their left and which on the right if they are to make their way west to Wuthering Heights?

Happy Christmas 2011

2011-12-24T08:32:00.001Z

Theatre review: Swallows and Amazons

2011-12-23T14:30:00.002Z

Better drowned than duffers; if not duffers won't drown

The staged version of Swallows and Amazons, currently on at the Vandeville Theatre, London, starts as it should with the telegram to the Walker children from their father.

It works wonderfully, telling the famous story over a few brief hours to an enraptured audience of children and their parents, grandparents, aunts and of course uncles.

Adults act all the parts, as can be seen by the Swallows above. But they capture the spirit of each child so that Roger is Roger-like, and Titty is Titty-like. The fact that the smallest child is played by the largest adult adds to the magic - and humour.

The scenery and props are deliberately sparse, with gaps filled by the audience's imagination - which is as it should be for a story where camping becomes exploring and sailing becomes pirating. So waves are a pair of blue ribbons and the boat a skeleton so you focus on the essentials of sail and heel.

A few changes to plot were required to fit it into an evening and songs were added, but all in a seamless and supportive way. One line caught my ear, sung by the Amazons about how they grew up wild:

with only the clouds and a four bedroom house for shelter

That nicely summed up the spirit of adventure and middle class background of the families!

A wonderful evening that adds rather than subtracts from the book. At least one of my nephews now wants to read the story and my brother to read it to him.

All in all a great success.

Some reviews from Telegraph, FT, Evening Standard and Guardian. Also check out these this video and this one.

Volvo activates cloaking device

2011-12-22T14:37:00.001Z

The first Volvo Ocean Race boat has entered stealth mode which is a fancy way of saying they're not telling us where the boats are. So you might as well stop going to their web site and instead read boating blogs like this one while eating a mince pie or two.

This was the locations this morning when the fleet could be seen heading NNE towards the Maldives and British Indian Ocean Territories.

Even here the information available was reduced, as according to my calculations the DTL was based upon a test point just in front of the leading boat i.e. not actually very helpful at all, though it must be admitted the scenario is hard to compute when all boats are close to a line (large GDOP in GPS terms).

The only one that is clearly where it should be is Sanya which is here:

All graphics thanks to Google Earth.

Book Review: To the Lands of the Vikings

2011-12-20T20:41:00.000Z

This book describes Trevor and Lesley Hodgson's voyage across the Atlantic the hard way, the way the Vikings did it.

Starting at Hull they cross the North Sea to Norway before heading west, first to the Shetlands and the Faroes, then Iceland and Greenland to finally arrive at Canada and in particular Newfoundland.

As they go they keep an eye out for remains of Vikings travels and places they mentioned in the sagas, and in particular those relating to the early voyages of discovery to Vinland.

It was clearly an amazing voyage undertaken by an adventurous retired couple who clearly are experienced sailors and have a good boat, Symphony.

However if it were me I wouldn't have written it in the present tense, as that becomes disconcerting to the reader after a while. It could also use a bit of trimming and more photos - plus it would be useful to have some dates, just to get an idea of the time of year they reached each location.

But I certainly enjoyed learning about life on those cold dark northern seas, as Trevor and Lesley sailed in the wake of the norsemen.

Ice skating at the Natural History Museum

2011-12-18T21:48:00.001Z

Breath deeply and you can almost smell the mulled wine and minced pies!

Yes, Christmas is just a week away and JP's been off ice skating.

No, not Somerset House this time but the rink outside the wonderful Natural History Museum. It was great though a bit smaller and more crowded.

The presents have been bought and wrapped, the tree decorated and sparkling, the cards written and ready to post, so:

let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!

Buff completes a "Volvo Circumnavigation"

2011-12-17T20:35:00.000Z

G'day all! Buff Staysail here! Buff by name and Buff by nature!

Well there's a bit of good news! Seems like Buff can claim to have done a circumnavigation of Australia - a "Volvo circumnavigation" that is.

But what is a "Volvo circumnavigation" you might ask? Well check out the latest race's leg 2 to see for yourself. Rather than sailing all the way to Abu Dhabi the yachts are only sailing the start and end bits and in between the boats are loaded onto a ship while the sailors rest it out.

Now that is the Buff style!

It reminds me of that summer when Brucy, Wes, Dave-boy and me, all good mates, got totally wasted and after jeez knows many tinnies promised to take Wes's Laser dinghy from Brizzy to Perth.

After one last sail - yours truly included - we stacked the ute with XXXX and headed off to the outback. After many adventures (see route above - got a bit lost around Alice to be honest) we ended up launching that ol' dinghy into the Indian Ocean and saying hello to the Fremantle Doctor.

Then it was time to return back home as me ma was having one of her turns.

But Buff had sailed the start and end of the journey on both sides of the lucky country - so in other words I had done a Volvo circumnavigation of Australia!!

Classic or what!

This is Buff Staysail, Volvo circumnavigator, over and out!

Where's the Volvo going?

2011-12-16T21:17:00.004Z

I'm having a problem understanding the point of Leg 2 of the Volvo Ocean Race. Ok, maybe it means something to those actually sailing it but to us watching we have no idea what is going on.

In theory its from Cape Town to Abu Dhabi but because of pirates its actually sailing to [CENSORED] at which point the boats will be put on a ship and ferried through the danger zone before being dropped off at [CENSORED] for a final sprint.

But as we haven't been told which "safe haven port" is the destination we have no idea who is in the lead or what routing tactics should be used. To further hide from us what is going on, we don't have distance to finish, though we do have some basic (lat, longs) and DTLs.

Ah-ha captain, this be solvable, this be. Yeh be a problem with two unknowns and five pieces of ~~eight~~ information, it be!

So I did wonder if the destination location it could be reverse engineered from parameters available and had a quick hack with C++:

According to this rather rough and ready code the destination is (-20.104, 57.531) which looks like Mauritius.

But if the organisers are so worried about security then surely they'd have thought of this reverse engineering trick and put in some randomisation to throw the calculations off the sense. Therefore the DTLs are either a security risk or meaningless.

So instead of a sailing competition this has turned into a game of bluff and code-cracking, not what the Volvo should be about.

More James Bond than Peter Blake, alas.

Updated: working from the (lat, longs) and DTLs tonight (Sunday 18th) we have a new destination, namely the Maldives as per this Google Earth map:

Google Earth and Pilot Books

2011-12-14T20:58:00.000Z

Its been a bit nippy recently, though some have braved the elements and gone out for a sail.

As keen readers might have noticed amongst the distractions involving rat matadors and lego Christmas Tree was a brief mention that JP might possibly be venturing out for an unseasonal excursion - for a good reason of course.

The where's and when's will remain TOP SECRET until planning is a bit further advanced but as to who is involved in this scheme if I say there's a Bond connection that might possibly be a clue.

In the mean time I'm having a lot of fun considering possible routes and even destinations, mucking about with Google Earth (above - note the Fastnet Race route is purely there as a red herring) and even buying pilot books.

Its a great way to pass an evening indoors when its dark outside.

MONSTER lurking in Olympic river

2011-12-13T15:30:00.001Z

Der-dum, der-dum, der-dum!!!

London's geese have another thing to worry about on top of it being the season to roast them. An unknown KILLER is on the loose on the river Lea and it is grabbing geese and pulling them underwater to their DEATH.

The River Lea seemed placid enough when I saw it where it joins the Thames at Trinity Wharf but before that it goes through east London, looping round the Olympic site, and that's where the ATTACKS occur.

So what is the aquatic fiend? Could the MONSTER be an ALLIGATOR or a CROCODILE - or even an escaped PYTHON? Or maybe its a giant pike, terrapin or mink?

Truth is no one knows so watch the ~~skys~~ waters!

Der-dum, der-dum, der-dum!!

Buff salutes Ben Ainslie

2011-12-10T22:10:00.004Z

G'day all! Buff Staysail here! Buff by name and Buff by nature!!

Thanks goodness at last those pommie sailors are showing some balls! Way back when ol' Buff was a lad sailors were sailors and had a girl in every port and would drink rum without coke. But the last of the old school were the Whitbread legends, and now its gone all pro like - you know, boring.

It's all training and families, good clean stuff, but not the sort of thing that get headlines. And what happens? Sailing gets a mere paragraph somewhere lost in the back pages. Jeez, journos like me deserve better.

So raise your sailing hat to Ben Ainslie for going mental and getting into an argument with a media boat. Buff says respect, mate!!

Look at those England football players - getting pissed, being caught with tarts, fighting (Arsenal even took on the US Marines), breaking things - and the fans love it!

In - ger - land! In - ger - land!!!

That's why Buff say's good on Ben and his brawl for raising sailing's coverage - BBC, Guardian, Telegraph, trending on Google News and Twitter - its PR gold!

I can hear it now, the sailing fan's chorus: all together now:

Sailings coming home, it's coming home!!!

This is Buff Staysail, reluctant pom supporter, calling out one more time:

In - ger - land!!

Tragedy on the ARC

2011-12-09T22:04:00.003Z

It was with shock that I read on the World Cruising web site of the death of one of the participants on the Atlantic Rally for Cruisers (ARC).

It wasn't the first death there's been on the ARC alas, but this caught my attention as the casualty, Andrew Nash, is thought to have had a heart attack while sailing on the same boat that I completed the ARC a few years ago, Ocean Wanderer.

I have almost entirely good memories of Ocean Wanderer (above, having arrived safely at St Lucia). It took us three weeks to cross, twenty ones days locked in a our little world, seeing nothing but water in all directions during the day and the endless stars at night.

But what will memories will it have for the current crew? And more importantly what will be the impact on Andrew Nash's wife and family, to whom he will never return and for whom Christmas is cancelled?

I am so sorry.

It was a dark and stormy night

2011-12-08T20:20:00.002Z

It was a dark and stormy night and Captain JP said to the mate "Tell us a story mate", and this is the story told:

It was a dark and stormy night and Captain JP said to the mate, "Tell us a story mate", and this is the story told:

It was a dark and stormy night and Captain JP said to the mate, "Tell us a story mate", and this is the story told:

It was a dark and stormy night and Captain JP said to the mate, "Tell us a story mate", and this is the story told:

...............................

Normal service will resume tomorrow.

America will see all episodes from epic Frozen Planet series

2011-12-07T22:37:00.000Z

I've just watched the seventh and final episode of the BBC's series Frozen Planet, and what a wonder it has been. David Attenborough (officially a national treasure) has for most of my life been presenting great natural history programs and this must rank as one of the best.

It has humbled as it has amazed and fascinated, leaving us the viewer awestruck, and every week has been a gem, especially when seen in the HD it deserves. I'm glad I managed to see every single episode, and will feel its absence next Wednesday.

But not everyone will see all seven, for some countries will only see six episodes, rejecting the final one, the one that talked about the polar regions warming.

Warming is an observation, what the team (and others) have seen. Such as the difference between the picture above of a glacier in Shackleton's days and the same one more recently, below:

Other observations are again just that, such as that military in their submarines have noted that the Arctic ice is in places half the thickness it was in the 1980s. Another is that the polar regions are heating many times - up to 10 times - that of the rest of the planet.

It is also a simple fact that the Larsen B ice shelf collapsed in 2002 and afterwards glaciers sped up six times.

But initially the Discovery channel in America said it would only transmit the first six, reluctant to broadcast those facts - or maybe it was those two dangerous words that David Attenborough said, namely "global warming".

Fortunately its been announced just in the last few days they will after all show the final episode, so Americans can decide for themselves, but its crazy it was even an issue.

Earlier this year I reviewed Simon Winchester's Atlantic including the catastrophic over-fishing of the Newfoundland Grand Banks which I described as "rather stupid".

I fear that we humans are about to be "rather stupid" on an epic scale.

Save the Putney River Bus!

2011-12-06T22:20:00.000Z

Oh no!

I read a sad story in today's Evening Standard: there's a serious danger that the river bus that connects Putney to central London will be closed.

For those that haven't had the joy of commuting by river bus (as above in the morning mist) it is by far the best way to get to central London during rush hours. You always get a seat and a great view with free coffee thrown in, and arrived feeling you've had a treat rather than been squashed in a sardine tin.

But it's quite expensive as its not subsidised and when the contract went up for renewal the present owners, Thames Executive Charters lost to Thames Clipper. Now this wasn't necessarily bad news as the clippers are a faster fleet of newish catamarans but alas they decided to send them only as far as Vauxhall.

A new pressure group has been formed with web site here that points out that the present service takes 3 million passengers per year.

Save the Putney River Bus!

The Christmas Tree

2011-12-05T22:12:00.002Z

"I saw three ships come sailing in....."

Christmas is definitely on its way.

While it can still be a pain, such as when supermarkets pipe xmas songs in their stores (yes, I mean you Sainsbury's), the boxes from Amazon have begun to be delivered filled with good things for my nephews and nieces.

Unlike shopping to ghastly music some things do bring a bit of that seasonal magic, such as this tree, currently gracing one of London's great railway stations.

It's just a tree, maybe you're thinking. No, this is a very special tree indeed, something that made passers by stop and go wow.

But what makes it special? Any good googlers out there?

The Hurlingham Club

2011-12-04T12:41:00.002Z

This is arguably the best address on the tidal Thames. It's the Hurlingham in Fulham, a private member's club based in this stately house on the banks of the River.

It goes back to Victorian era where it was founded as a place to shoot pigeons, and at its height hundreds would be blasted from the sky by the likes of the Edward VII when he was Prince of Wales.

It hosted the polo Olympics the first time the games were in London, way back in 1908 (we won - ok all three teams for some reason seemed to come from Britain). Now offers its well healed members some of London's best dinning and sporting facilities including tennis and croquet.

Back in September there was an open day in which non-members were shown round, but even then it was exclusive, with just the two tour times. It was very impressive, but I did feel it wasn't for the likes of me, which was just as well as the waiting list is estimated as 15 years.

But they keep a part of the river bank green and free from developers which is definitely a big plus.

When rats attack! ... or the rat matador and other stories

2011-12-03T13:16:00.004Z

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man ..... oops, slight distraction there. What meant to say it's well known that JP doesn't do frost-biting.

Or at least hasn't - there are plans, wheels within wheels, the game's afoot etc - but more on that another time. So without anything boat related here's the first of three London tales, starting with a long grey tail.

Yesterday I saw a rat, a big one, and it saw me. But rather than running away (it that is, not me) the darn thing charged straight at me. Fleet of foot I jumped to one side like a rat matador only to see the little blighter swing round and have another charge.

Hello, hello, hello, thinks I, what's all this? I remembered an urban myth about squirrels in Brixton getting addicted to crack after digging up drug dealer's stashes and wondered whether I was facing a rat having a bad trip or just your everyday demonic possession.

Thinking on my feet I crossed the road and in the swirl of traffic it got distracted and was last seen squatting in the middle of the tarmac chattering to itself (probably something on the lines of "I told you it was a bad idea running a budget deficit of 4% of GDP at the height of a boom" but I don't speak rat).

Maybe it was just hungry but it didn't look thin: rather plump actually. I'm told that rats were considered a delicacy on board naval ships in the time of Nelson, but today you can get many things at your local farmer's market, such as pheasants (above), but not rat.

I know this for sure as today I went to my local one in Barnes and jolly good it was too, especially at extracting £20 notes from my wallet. I got some fish, some naughty but nice chocolate thing, some soup and some bread from a stand very like this one from the Bursledon Blog.

Then back to JP HQ and a quick trip to YouTube to watch again that sketch from Armstrong and Miller called "The Farmer's Market".

Then for some reason checked out the trailer for Ratatouille......

Save Victory in a Bottle

2011-11-30T20:43:00.001Z

For the last year and a half Yinka Shonibare's version of HMS Victory in a gigantic glass bottle (above from this post) has been standing on the 4th plinth in Trafalgar Square.

Its stay is coming to an end early next year and rather than be sent off into the sunset like The Fighting Temeraire it has been proposed that it be purchased for the nation and located outside the National Maritime Museum in Greenwich.

I think that's an excellent idea and will be adding my name (and dosh) to the list at the Art Fund's web site.

But it seems that not everyone is in favour - as the first comment on the site shows!

Oh dear :(

Wild Beasts in Shepherds Bush

2011-11-28T21:03:00.003Z

By a bit of diary juggling and frantic tube connections just managed to squeeze in a trip to the O2 Shepherds Bush Empire to see Wild Beasts, and it was fab.

If you don't know them Wild Beasts are a guitar based band from England's Lake District, though they have recently migrated south to London by way of Leeds. They have an unusual sound, as if they are the chamber music of rock, a falsetto voice over metallic chords.

Here it was a bit more full blooded, with heavy base tuned to make rib-cages and the sticky floor vibrate. Maybe a little too heavy for the delicate numbers but it certainly gave the Hooting and Howling song an edge that's not there in the CD.

It was a great set, reinforcing how good their writing is, quality that gave them a Mercury Prize nomination. Again and again I'd find myself thinking "Oh I like this one" with the occasional "I really like this one".

The gig ended with "The end comes too soon", its climactic chord held for minutes, shimmering around the theatre, circling an audience looking up, as the band retreated into the stage's shadows to drink a glass of wine.

It was a bold, almost experimental move, a far cry from mainstream pop risking comparison with prog-rock excesses, but for me it worked, creating a memorable experience similar to the hypnotic effects of Steve Reich.

A good evening out in London town well entertained by a band worth watching out for.

Links here to reviews from The Independent, Daily Mail and Star.

Buff's Press Conference

2011-11-27T21:35:00.003Z

Recently Buff Staysail threw his sailor's hat into the ring to start the long road that could lead to the White House. Alas the press conference that followed did not go smoothly, as this transcript reveals....

Buff Staysail

G'day my fellow Americans! Any questions?

Undecided

Is Buff Staysail your real name or is it actually something like Islam?

Buff Staysail

Are you kidding? I'm Buff Staysail!! Buff by name and Buff by nature!!

Yachting World

Is it true this story we hear about you behaving inappropriately with the fair Sabrine during the America's Cup in Valencia?

Buff Staysail

I have no recollection of the incident you are describing.

Sacramento Bee

What's your foreign policy, Buff? How you getting on with your Uzbekistans and Azerbaijans?

Buff Staysail

My peep are on the case and have told me what to say.

Buff squints so he can read out the following text written on his hand

I love Israel above all else ...er... and my foreign policy documents will have ... er... the words "Pro Israel B.S." stamped on them.

Buff's Ma

What a fibber you are Buff! All this stuff and nonsense about being born in Hawaii - it was in the Royal Brisbane of course! Didn't stop crying for a whole day!

Buff Staysail

Ma? What are you doing here?

Buff's Ma

You drag me all the way from my cosy retirement home to hear you say you love this Issy floosy above even me!!

Buff Staysail

Ma, not now!!

Buff's Ma

You come home with me right now young man! And I discover if you've been misbehaving on those trips to Europe you'll be in real trouble!

Buff Staysail (exiting)

Yes ma.

Oh no! Looks like Buff won't be allowed out for a while.

Maybe you Americans have something else to be thankful for.

Buff for President!

2011-11-24T15:10:00.001Z

G'day all! Buff Staysail here! Buff by name and Buff by .... er... I mean my fellow Americans!

Yes, Buff Staysail is throwing his sailor's hat into the ring and entering the race for the presidency!!

But surely, Buff, you are about to ask, don't you come from Queensland, Australia?

A good question, and until recently I would have said too right cobber, till it was discovered I was actually born in Hawaii - and yes, we will have copies of the birth certificate for you once we have sorted out some ~~Paintshop Pro~~ technical difficulties.

But sure, Buff, your next question would be, do you think you are qualified?

Actually turns out I'm just the man for the job. You know when ol' JP goes barfing on about global warming and evolution it goes wooosh over Buff's head but it seems like that's just the ticket to get the ticket.

As to policies my corner stone is the 8-8-8 program - but hold your horses, let me explain.

Firstly, nine sounds like nein which is what a NAZI might say.

Secondly, eight sounds like ate which is what an AMERICAN would do.

Thirdly, 8 is smaller than 9 so the rich would pay less tax, and if there are any of the 1% out there reading this blog, there are significant tax benefits in funnelling your campaign contributions via the Billionaires for Buff vehicle.

Anyhow that's enough of your's truly, you good folks all have questions, you know, about the America's Cup, Lib ............... er ............. ..................... er ............. ................... .................... Liberia??

Anyhow, nows the time to give it your best shot. What's on your mind?

This is Buff Staysail, over and not out but listening!!!

.... oh, yes, and Happy Thanksgiving!!!

Book Review: Atlantic

2011-11-21T21:44:00.000Z

I actually finished this book a few weeks ago but pressure of work meant this review had to be put off.

In one way its a shame, as many of the minutiae of Simon Winchester's weighty tome have already merged together in one almighty swell. But maybe that is appropriately like the great ocean it describes.

This impressive book uses as its frame the seven ages of a man's life as given in Shakespeare's As you like it:

Infant: here we learn about how humanity first discovered the ocean - maybe very young in our history, on shores of South Africa

Schoolboy: in which various expeditions are sent out to turn those here be dragons and the edge of the world myths into charts and scientific discoveries

Lover: describing how the Atlantic has been portrayed in the arts, in art, music, novels and plays, including of course Shakespeare - who can forget The Tempest?

Soldier: alas these waters have run red too many times in our history as the blood of good men and women has dissolved into the sea, from the Romans to the Falklands.

Justice: ok, well in fact this section looks at trade, from the infamous slave trade to the beaverings of the Hanseatic league, to the packet ships and telegraph cables

Pantaloon: with old age creeping in Winchester looks at how we have despoiled our own environment, such as the catastrophic (and rather stupid) over fishing of the Newfoundland Grand Banks

Sans everything: takes the big view of an ocean that is getting bigger as sea levels rises and storms and flood threaten our great cities, and yet in the very long term is doomed as continents divided rejoin, squeezing the Atlantic away

Its one of those books that demand phrases like large canvas, for it is a huge subject. But Winchester does it proud, and his travels have given him a rock to build on.

From the south and being locked in a prison cell in Argentina during the Falklands war to the far north and being stuck by bad weather in a distant Greenland fjord called Scoresbysund, his many travels and experiences add flavour, colour and a human scale.

If I had to quibble I'd say the structure doesn't match the standard story structure, making it at times disjointed - oh, and the hardback version is too heavy.

But overall I really enjoyed this read and wouldn't hesitate to recommend it. Just make sure you get the paperback version!

Three Volvo photos

2011-11-18T20:46:00.001Z

Its been another manic week of work after a weekend of family business, so blogging has been firmly in the back seat. I've had just enough time to follow the Volvo Ocean Race, though its been a bit of a procession after Groupama's diversion to the Canaries (bravo for taking the risk).

Unlike the last post this one show photos of real Volvo yachts. Above is from the 2005-06's in-port race in Portsmouth, while below is another Solent sail, a day trip I had out on News International which competed in the 2001-02 circumnavigation:

Finally, below is another Volvo 70, Ericsson (the one, I think, from 2005-6), spotted in Stockholm during the Square Metre Rule Anniversary back in 2008:

Next week's schedule not looking much better than last, but will be keeping an eye out on those ocean racers. Tactics for the next stage look more interesting, with all sorts of route wiggling options to get them to Cape Town.

Soon we will all be able to put our feet up and relax.

Updated: for O'Docker here's a fourth picture (see comments):

Three photos for the Volvo

2011-11-11T19:42:00.000Z

It's been one of those massively hectic weeks where have really valued escaping even for a few minutes onto the Volvo Ocean Race web site. Compared to meetings, presentations, teleconferences, papers, projects, networking etc etc sailing non-stop four hours on four hours off seemed like a really good way to spend one's time.

So in return here are some of my photos with indirect connections to the Volvo. For example the one above I took when sailing near the Canary Islands which Groupama has, in an interesting navigational choice, just passed to the east (bonus marks for identifying the class of yacht).

Below are fishing dhows in Abu Dhabi, which is also the name one of the teams in the VOR. Alas they had a rather too dramatic start to the leg to South Africa, dismasting before they'd even left the Med.

So this is what Abu Dhabi didn't see - one of the Pillars of Hercules, the Rock of Gibraltar. When I was there we had no wind whatsoever, and hence had to motor. We passed a racing fleet that was drifting rather a lot:

The forecast is for posting to remain doldrum like erratic for the near future, but hopefully will be back in the trades shortly afterwards.

Volvo Crumble

2011-11-06T20:21:00.001Z

Its come around again, the Volvo Ocean Race, and I can just see my productivity falling. A minute in the morning checking the positions over the first coffee and then again in the afternoon over a cuppa tea, it all adds up.

But what is this? Already things are falling apart with a full third of the fleet (ok, two boats) out of action, with a dismasting and hole in the hull of another.

Watch this space, as they say. Hopefully nothing will happen similar to those dramatic events in the Celebrity Yacht Race - as covered by our very own Buff Staysail - which sailed those very waters back in 2007.

The photo above, btw, is of my apple crumble (caramelised apples underneath, brown sugar and walnuts in the crumble) - yum - as requested by Baydog.

Fireworks night

2011-11-05T21:26:00.000Z

I love a good fireworks show.

Tonight London smells of gunpowder on an evening dry and brrr! cold - but I've just had home made apple crumble fresh from the oven.

That was pretty good too.

Season of mists on the Thames

2011-11-04T20:40:00.004Z

Its the season where you seem to get all sorts of weather in quick succession.

One day you need coat and umbrella, the next the skies are blue and the talk is of Indian summers. Its also seems to be the time of year when mists roll down the Thames along with the tide.

Its rather poetic, as the bridges at Putney dramatically rise from the clouds (above). Lighters are unmasked, glimpsed briefly and then the curtain is drawn across again:

Wraiths, columns of air and suspended microscopic droplets of water, stalk down river.

Then the sun bursts through, evaporating these apparitions and imaginations, and it is time to get back to work.

Single handed sailing

2011-11-03T21:42:00.000Z

I was going to follow up yesterday's post with a health and safety report into Slocum's voyage around the world, but it seemed a bit too easy.

You can just imagine it: "no up to date charts, not even a single GPS or EPIRB, no radar reflector, log burning fire risk, no life raft or grab bags bla bla bla."

But there does seem an important issue here - can single handed sailing be sufficiently safe that it can be encouraged through organised races?

I dunno......I mean, one person can't be on watch all the time, and the stats show it is a lot more dangerous than crewed races such as the Volvo starting this weekend.

Double handed seems to be a better solution. No more "around alone" but "sail with a mate" - unless of course you're lucky enough to "meet and fall in love".

After all even Slocum got married - not just once but twice.

The Cockleshell Heroes Health and Safety Report

2011-11-02T21:15:00.002Z

Last night the BBC had a TV program about Operation Frankton, the operation that was turned into the film Cockleshell Heroes. I had only heard a little about this WW2 raid by on Bordeaux by canoe and so found it very interesting indeed.

However in addition I was lucky enough to be sent anonymously the following Health and Safety Report:

Diversity Objectives

The first question about this raid comes from the selection of the commandos, and whether there was a proactive inclusivity policy? Given that all marines were white males, I think not!

Time Management

The unit set off from a submarine in the English Channel in the evening of the 7th December 1942. Over the next few days it was clear that the marines were forced the exceed the mandatory working hours limits laid done in EU Directive 2003/88/EC. Furthermore the anti-social hours were counter to good home/work balance and there were no child minding facilities.

Equipment

The unit were in paddling low profile kayaks, painted a dark colour, at night, in a busy shipping lane up the Loire river with a significant amount of traffic (Nazi patrol boats), and yet they didn't have a single high visibility jacket between them! Why?

Stress Management

At the entrance to the river were a number of tidal races with overhangs resulting large waves with steep sides. In the confusion and conditions several boats were lost, either to the elements or ending up in enemy hands. Only 2 of the 6 boats made it through.

In such situations it would be understandable, as an act of respect and sensitivity to those lost, to return immediately for intensive counselling at the Happy Bean Bag Therapy Centre. That they continued is indicative of a retrograde phallocentric management style rather than modern inclusive whole-person holistic decision making.

Consumables

The remaining commandos then encountered some local French fishermen and their families who provided them with fresh bread and half a bottle of red wine. At no point did they enquire as to whether they used approved baking processes or what the bread's use-by date was. As to the consumption of alcohol while carrying high explosives, well words fail me!

Health and Well-being

After leaving the fishermen, the remaining two kayaks paddled on up the river, covering 25 miles in one stretch. And yet none of the team was a qualified physio-therapist and the constant repetitive motion was simply asking for RSI!

Ear-muffs

On reaching Bordeaux the two kayaks split up and laid their limpet mines against the sides of ships trading with the enemy. In the resulting explosions, yes, they did destroy 5 or 6 ships, but did no one consider the noise and provide them with ear protection? That is was ISO 4869 is for people!!

International Impact Analysis

At this point they ran away - and not just back to home as they should. The remaining four (well two, as the other team were captured) made their way through France, into Spain and thus to a Crown Dependency, Gibraltar. Did they have no idea of the amount of paper work that would generate? Had they no consideration for others??

Conclusions

Officially the two survivors, Major Hasler and Marine Bill Sparks, were welcomed back with a DSO and DSM respectively.

But if Health and Safety had had their way they would have been awarded an F-.

A frightful anniversary

2011-10-31T20:27:00.004Z

Today I share something with Alex and Taru.

No, I do not have a glamorous life sailing around the world, enjoying stunningly beautiful blue water, but like them today is an anniversary.

For me it is blogging, for 6 years ago today the first post went live. If I were 6 now I would be out there banging on doors demanding free chocolate, for today is Halloween!!

Being a little bit older I'll be connecting some appropriately spooky dots, and going back to the painter John Martin. As well as a career in art and a side line in designing London's sewage system he had time to raise not just 6 of his own children but also take under his wing a young woman called Jane Webb.

Jane Webb went on to write The Mummy (above) and the ever connected John Martin could also claim to know William Goldwin whose daughter wrote Frankenstein. It might not have been a coincidence then that one of Martin's own daughters married an Egyptologist.

Indeed there sometimes seems no limit to the connections John Martin made. He shared lodgings with the future King of Belgium (who became godfather to one of Martin's children) and at his dinner parties you could meet Dickens, Michael Faraday, Turner and John Tenniel, the illustrator of Lewis Carroll's books.

One amazing story has him on the footplate of a steam train with none other than Isambard Kingdom Brunel thundering along at 90 mph as they proved conclusively that a train could go faster than a horse.

What a great life!

Frozen Planet, Epic Viewing

2011-10-30T10:00:00.002Z

This weekend many of us in the northern hemisphere got an extra hour and I spent it watching the BBC's new series, Frozen Planet, about life at the highest of high latitudes, the poles.

It was an hour of saying "wow" and the occasional "effing wow".

Landscapes that make the Lord of the Rings look wimpy, waterfalls dropping a mile through the ice sheet, explosive birth of icebergs out of glaciers, a polar bear hunting for a mate, wolves taking down a bison, whales blasting through bait balls, sea lions surfing under a wave trying (and failing) to catch a penguin, humpbacks leaping from the water, killer whales deliberately making waves to crack ice or knock seal prey into the water then using bubbles as a smoke screen, underwater wood lice the size of dinner plates, ice caves around the volcano Erebus, rock formations carved from 200 mph winds, the Mars like dry valleys ..... the spectacles continued non-stop.

It was narrated by the national living treasure that is David Attenborough (who is a dot somewhere in the picture above).

For those in the UK I hope you are watching. For those outside prepare to be amazed.

Film: Tacita Dean at the Tate Modern

2011-10-28T21:59:00.002Z

One of the joys of London is being able to pop into the Tate Modern's cavernous Turbine Hall to discover the latest installation. And that's exactly what I did last weekend.

What I found was Tacita Dean's tribute to 35mm film called, er, FILM. Unlike in the cinema where the screen is much wider than it is tall here it is on end, reaching almost to the hall's roof.

In the 11 minute loop she demonstrates the range of techniques and textures than can be created by old fashioned analogue methods, using filters and cut-outs. And the loop itself is physical - a single loop of celluloid.

One of the main images is of the far end to the Turbine Hall itself, while others include fountains, streams, waves approaching a beach and mushrooms. Children love it, rushing up to the screen, trying to catch falling images, like the bubble above.

I enjoyed it, though I wouldn't rave as some reviewers have. I'm rather prosaically in favour of new tech, despite the odd hiccup.

Its really nice, lying there on that endless expense of poured concrete, watching silhouetted children and waiting for those mushrooms to come round yet again. I can totally recommend you go and see it.

However I couldn't help but think, again and again, why make life so difficult? It must have taken ages to do all of that the old fashioned way, cutting ribbons of film and gluing frames together again.

Just, like, load it up to MovieMaker dude. (or Final Cut Pro if you've got a Mac).

Maybe that work is the point. It was a bit like those Sunflowers Seeds of Ai Weiwei, in which each of the uncountable millions was created by hand (though it was a shame you couldn't walk on them as was intended).

But at the end of the day 35mm film is - or rather was - for me a tool that could be used to tell a story, and its that mix of character and plot that interests me.

Something, indeed, like Casablanca.

Play it, Sam, play "As time goes by"

Sigh. Now that was true magic.

John Martin, Charles Dickens, Sir Francis Walsingham and Tracy Edwards

2011-10-26T22:50:00.005Z

John Martin had a Dickensian quality about him. Indeed he was a friend of Charles Dickens and it is not impossible that one of the latter's characters was based upon Martin.

But I'm not thinking one of the artists in Dickens - though there's no reason why not - but rather the inventor Daniel Doyce from Little Dorrit.

For there was another side to Martin than those epic biblical canvases, namely the entrepreneur and inventor who was literally decades ahead of his time. Twenty years before Bazalgette he was proposing a sewage system for London, with architectural plans uncannily like the eventual designs.

He even proposed using the embankment of the Thames not just for tunnels but also for a railway network, proposing a loop around London not dissimilar to the Circle line.

As part of the exhibition on John Martin at the Tate was his plan for London showing new stations - such as one at Battersea, something that is still being talked about, a hundred and eighty years later.

Indeed the sewage system of London is still a topic of much debate. As has been posted here before, there is ongong controversy about plans for a "super sewer" that will follow the course of the Thames from Hammersmith to Docklands. It is waiting, however, on decisions about where the access tunnels should be located.

One of the hottest debates is about whether one should be at Barn Elms. This is where, many, many years ago, Queen Elizabeth's spy master Sir Francis Walsingham used to live in the days of the Armada.

Now it is a pleasant green space where there are rowing, sailing and canoe clubs, and having their activities disturbed for seven years by diggers is proving to be rather unpopular.

Indeed non other than round the world sailor Tracy Edwards has added her voice to the campaign to stop the shaft, saying "This is the busiest stretch of the river for water sports, and is used by everyone from complete novices to Olympic athletes to train and enjoy one of the most beautiful spots in London"

Quite right too.

But please, do hurry up. I do really feel that after all this waiting it is time to finally finish what John Martin first worked on back in 1828.

Tate Britain: Apocalypse (last weekend)

2011-10-25T19:55:00.003Z

Last weekend the world almost ended - or at least according to Harold Camping. It's hard to keep up, the world seemed to have been about to end soooo many times this year.

It seemed right, therefore, to go to the Tate Britain to see the exhibition Apocalypse of work by artist John Martin (as in the example above)

You certainly got value for money for his canvases were super sized and if you like the colour red, well you'll really like them. Epic scale, some with hundreds of people dwarfed by landscapes that seem to go on forever. Almost always there were snow capped mountains looming high above pastoral scenes, that, like Narnia, looked suspiciously like an English country estate.

The subject was usually biblical or classical era - think fall of Babylon or Pompeii - and the results were popular, drawing in the crowds like the summer blockbuster. The pictures went on tour, some going as far as Australia.

The art establishment was sniffy. "But is it art?" they would ask, as so many have before and after. Indeed when the Tate Britain was flooded and a John Martin got damaged the curators basically shrugged their shoulders. It was just a John Martin, after all.

It must be admitted they are not break-through material. It's not like Turner where you go wow, that's something new and different. It gets repetitive and the execution feels more like manufacturing than creation.

But it is good entertainment - pictures you like you haven't seen before, and you won't forget John Martin's name afterwards.

If, of course, there is an afterwards........

Frankenstein and Putney

2011-10-23T19:50:00.000Z

In these times of ours, though concerning the exact year there is no need to be precise, a boat of dirty and disreputable appearance, with two figures in it, floated on the Thames, between Southwark bridge which is of iron, and London Bridge which is of stone, as an autumn evening was closing in.

What's this? you are probably thinking. Has JP finally lost it? This quote is from Dickens not Shelley and those two bridges are down river in central London, not leafy Putney - where is this post going?

Hold on, we'll get to that. But lets focus on that image from Our Mutual Friend of the waterman on the Thames one autumnal evening, about to recover a body from the cold waters of the Thames, for that is what this tale is all about.

If you had been standing on old Putney Bridge in November 1795 you would have witnessed a very sad scene. A lady, her heart broken as she realised her beloved would never be hers, decided to kill herself. She went out in the pouring rain until her clothes were heavy with water then threw herself off that bridge, determined to end her sorry lot.

Fortunately two watermen spotted this attempt and were able to rescue her, and in time she recovered and was able to love again. Indeed she married and had two children, both daughters.

The eldest was Mary Wollstonecraft Godwin who later married the poet Shelley, It while she was on holiday by Lake Geneva with her husband and Lord Byron that she wrote that great novel, Frankenstein.

If it wasn't for those two unknown watermen who picked her mother Mary Wollstonecraft, also a writer, from the muddy, dark, cold waters of the Thames Frankenstein would never had been written and we would not have the monster in the photo above.

So you could say that in a way the monster came from that river: a disturbing thought as I peer out at the dark, listening to the wind howling in the trees.

The Armada and Putney

2011-10-21T19:00:00.001Z

So how could Putney be linked to the Spanish Armada?

There must, of course, be so many ways. It's a bit like saying what's the connection between Putney and WW2: you wouldn't know where to start.

However there was one in particular worth mentioning, Queen Elizabeth's spy chief lived there. Sir Francis Walsingham controlled a network of spies across the continent, feeding the English with vital information as to the status of preparations.

He would retire to peace to his manor house at Barn Elm's just upriver from Putney, where now you will find two canoe clubs, one sailing club and a rowing club. There he'd plot, plan and scheme how England would defend itself.

And there he entertained his Queen and their court in May 1589, the year after the Armada. And no doubt they toasted their victory in fine wines, though maybe not Chateauneuf-du-Pape.

Book Review: The Defeat of the Spanish Armada

2011-10-20T21:13:00.005Z

The defeat of the Spanish Armada is one of those classic stories of English history, one that mixes a bucket of truth with more than a tumbler of myth. But it wasn't one I knew much about so I found this book in a second hand stall it felt like an easy £1 to spend.

And good value that turned out to be. This is the classic written by American historian Garrett Mattingly which won the Pulitzer prize back in 1960 and a cracking read it turned out to be, one that I was looking forward to picking up again, to find out "what happened next".

It follows the story from the execution of Mary Stuart to the aftermath and consequences of the defeat of the greatest power of the day by those upstart English (not Brits or Limeys yet). The excitement builds as the Armada prepares and then sets sails, and you can image the thrill of getting to a chapter with the great title and subtitle of "First Blood: The Eddystone to Start Point, July 31st, 1588".

Mattingly is clearly a professional historian, taking a balanced view from both sides, in particular treating the Spanish admiral Medina Sidonia with great respect, noting how it was his decisions saved many ships in his fleet from destruction.

But there is also strong respect for the English leaders, for Drake, Hawkins, Howard, Frobisher and of course Gloriana herself, Queen Elizabeth.

A few minor quibles: the style is showing its age (purple and formalistic), there was (for me) too much detail on the situation in France and finally he freely interchanges alternative names for the key players, so you have to concentrate to keep up.

But that shouldn't stop you buying and then reading what is certainly a classic, if not the classic, telling of the Spanish Armada.

My copy had further signs that I was on to a good thing: stuck within were a Heffers bookmark (Tillerman will understand) and the label from a bottle of Chateauneuf-du-Pape.

A glass of highly quaffable wine in one hand and this book in the other: I suspect the previous owner must have had an entertaining evening's read.

Book Review: Ultimate Sailing Adventures

2011-10-17T19:34:00.002Z

I got this book over the weekend, tempted, as the nights are getting longer, by the pictures and stories of sailing adventures. It has something for everyone, ranging from the canals of France to exploring the Northwest passage.

The ones I've done are:
- Round the Island Race
- Sydney Harbour
- Land's End
- Sail up the Thames
- Fastnet
- Sushi at sea
- Charter in Greece
- Cowes Week
- Race around Portland Bill
- Oysters in Cornwall
- East Coast sailing (ok, in a dinghy)
- Wander in a Wayfarer (ok, have sailed a Wayfarer)
- Cross the English Channel

Some of the others to be honest I can't see myself ever doing - the likes of competing in the Volvo or Vendee Globe, but there are plenty of ideas for future sails.

One thing I wasn't sure about was it has this concept of difficulty.

Now I can see that sailing a Wayfarer could be anything from "simple" to "extreme" depending upon where you sail it. But how is it that both rounding Land's End and Portland Bill are described as "tricky" but the Fastnet, which involves both, is only described as "moderate" - the same as Charter in Greece? I mean - seriously?

Sailing in the ARC or in a classics regatta weren't on the list so maybe there needs to be a list of 200 sailing adventures?

What sailing adventures would be on your list?

Printed vs. iPad Yachting World

2011-10-15T17:05:00.001Z

Every now and then I buy Yachting World and this week feeling like reading about Alex and Taru's (though really I think its Taru and Alex's) guide the Caribbean decided to get the latest copy.

But what format to choose? The paper version you might expect to be the more expensive. After all it requires glossy paper, a printer, distribution, shops space, sales assistant plus of course some will be damaged, other unsold etc etc - all very analogue and old tech.

It's also not locked into a single e-magazine format (Vinio) being totally portable, shareable - you can even give your copy to someone else to read.

The web 2.0 iPad version on the other hand has zero additional cost, zero distribution cost, zero storage cost, zero sales cost and its rights are locked to a device, so surely - surely - would cost less.

As you might have guessed by now that wasn't the case with the glossy paper version costing £ 4.50 while the Vinio version cost £ 5.49 - which is 22% more.

Now this would be a surprise if I didn't know about Apple's policy to take 30% of everything sold on their devices.

Given that iCloud isn't working for me this is all turning out to be not a good week for me and my less than magically iThings.

Updated: maybe I'm just showing my age at using an old technology that doesn't work as a baby expects:

Apple's iCloud doesn't "just work"

2011-10-14T14:38:00.003Z

A technology tale for Friday.

A few years ago I tried Apple's magical MobileMe to synchronise my calendar between iPhone, iPad and PC, but whatever I did it duplicated entries. Thinking I must be doing something wrong I contacted Apple support, but after three hours of messaging with their "expert" the only difference was now the entries were triplicated.

It appears that I was not alone as even Steve Jobs said MobileMe wasn't that great - but he also said that things would be different with iCloud.

So it was with hope in my heart that on Wednesday I started the update to iOS 5. Well that took 6 hours - from 6pm to midnight - just for the iPad. Eventually I got both the iThings up to date, downloaded the iCloud control panel for Windows and was able to tick all the boxes and upgrade my MobileMe to the iCloud.

Hurrah!

Then following the instructions carefully I uploaded my calendar from my iPhone to the iCloud servers sitting somewhere in South Carolina. Logging into the web site, yes there they all were.

Right, thinks I lets give this a whirl and create a new event on the iPhone and watch it appear on the iCloud web site as if by magic.

Nothing happened. Oh yes, I forgot to switch on push/fetch, so turned that on and had a look on the web and what did I see but - duplicate entries appear. One by one the events over the last few weeks were being replicated like an out of control virus.

Noooooooooo!!!!!

So I switch off push/fetch, delete the iCloud calendar and spend a very boring time deleting duplicate entries on the iPhone.

Huh.

What to do next? Should I contact Apple tech support - given they failed this task last time? Should I switch to a Samsung while I can before Apple's legal department bans them here too?

Apple's iCloud - for me it just doesn't work.

MTP 102

2011-10-13T19:51:00.001Z

Over on the Bursledon Blog there's some interesting pictures of the high speed launch HSL 102.

Last month I saw another historic looking craft also with the number 102, as can be seen above. Having done a quick Google I can see it is a historic craft too, one that served in WW2.

The 100 + a bit number indicates a prototype, in this case built by Vosper Ltd, and MTP stands for motor torpedo boat (check out the tubes on the foredeck).

She was the fastest wartime British naval vessel in service at 48 knots, though here keeping to the 6 knot speed limit as part of the ADLS Vets Cruise on Thames.

More information from Wikipedia here or the trust web site here.

JP slacker shock

2011-10-10T19:35:00.002Z

G'day all! Buff Staysail here! Buff by name and Buff by nature!

Well I've always said that JP was a bit of slacker and now I've got the evidence to prove it. This photo was found on the interweb thing and it clearly shows Aeolus, the boat that JP claimed to be crewing as foredecker.

But what is this we see? Two boots, clearly raised and at rest, the owner lying back relaxing - in a race!!!

If I'm shaking my head it is more in sorrow than disbelief.

This is Buff Staysail, disappointed but not surprised, signing off.

The Mousehole

2011-10-09T10:33:00.003Z

One of the walks on the All roads... TV show ended up at the little port of Mousehole (above). This is an incredibly picturesque little village around a nearly semi-circular harbour and I stayed there just recently for the wedding of one of the crew members of Aeolus, the classic yacht I sailed in Fowey earlier this year.

I won't try to explain how to pronounce its name as every time I tried I was told I got it wrong - but will go as far as to say it is not a combination of the words "mouse" and "hole".

One of its claims to fame was it was destroyed by the Spanish in the years after the Armada, which coincidentally I am reading about at the moment. But if it is a more recent construction (by which I mean post 1595!) it is still very pretty:

For those rowers out there, yes it has a rowing club too:

Well worth a visit if you find yourself at the far end of Cornwall.

All roads

2011-10-06T19:54:00.001Z

Last night there was a program on the BBC called All Roads Lead Home in which three presenters used techniques of natural navigation to make their way around Cornwall.

The natural navigation bits were good.

There was a description of how to use trees as direction finders given their shape is often influenced by prevailing winds (SW in the UK), as in the pic above which was described as the Trump hairstyle.

Another influence on trees was the N/S variation in growth, the so-called tick effect as in the following graphic:

A high spot was the dung compass, in which the sun will dry the N/S sides at different rates as in the following helpful graphic:

There was more about lichens (complicated) and using the orientation of churches (simpler) but rather a lot of the three presenters just chatting. It felt a bit like 3 men doing something boaty without the boats, and while there was Sue Perkins, she didn't once mention soggy bottoms or tarts, let alone say "on your marks, get set, bake".

To be honest I'd recommend anyone interested in learning about natural navigation that the best way would be to buy and read the book.

If you want an update on unnatural natural navigation there's a list of top tips at the BBC. Number 1 tip, about satellite dishes, is a favourite of mine, though I say they are SSE rather than SE, but there you go.

Watch this

2011-10-04T20:35:00.000Z

The last couple of weeks have been manic and so instead of blogging have been mostly working. This evening things slacked off enough to give me time to watch the final of the TV institution that is the Great British Bake Off (GBBO).

But it has just finished, with Jo crowned queen baker (and well done her) so I was just wondering what I should watch next when up came this trailer for a program that included one of the presenters of the GBBO, namely Sue Perkins, and a certain face that seemed rather familiar (above).

Yup, the Natural Navigator is back with a TV show on prime-time BBC called "All roads lead home" and I for one shall be watching.

Being here

2011-09-30T19:53:00.000Z

Yesterday evening was standing on Silver Street Bridge, Cambridge looking at the Cam and with it came a flood of memories and conflicting emotions.

It was nice to visit but it was all too brief and I had to be indoors working rather than wandering those timeless backs. It was a shame I didn't have time to see old friends who live there and go punting but nice to remember back to those student days. However that nostalgia brings with it a sense of time passing, that you can never return to when you were young.

I consoled myself with a Fitzbillies Chelsea Bun and it was every bit as sweet and sticky as they were all those years ago, then with a sigh returned to my emails.

Shark tows kayak

2011-09-28T12:02:00.001Z

I like kayaking, don't get me wrong. It's just you have to keep paddling, like, all the time. So big thumbs up to Devon vet Rupert Kirkwood who has found an alternative - get a tow from a shark!

Ok, it was unplanned and he's yet to work out how to direct it, but the idea is definitely worth further study. As reported at the BBC here, he went out in his sea kayak to go fishing, caught himself a tope shark and then it towed him half a mile or so.

So what's it like being dragged out to sea by a shark in a little plastic kayak? "Fun" of course, though he did admit its nose "came to within inches of my sensitive parts."

Hmmm..... further research definitely required into the safety implications of this form of propulsion.

World Rivers Day: the lost Fleet

2011-09-25T19:46:00.000Z

For World Rivers Day here's a picture of one of London's lost river, the River Fleet, which gave its name to Fleet Street and hence Britain's press that used to be based there.

According to The Lost Rivers of London by Nicholas Barton Lord Nelson used to stay with his uncle in Kentish Town that was on the banks of the river "in order to keep an eye on the Fleet".

In earlier days it was even grander: Wren and Hooke created an elegant canal, as seen in the picture above.

Indeed the further back you go back the wider the river seems to have been. In Roman times it was big enough for major ships and possibly had a tidal mill.

Now it is just a drain, part of London's sewage system. Eric Newby described how "at the lowest level the Fleet itself raced riverwards at a good ten knots, too strong to stand up on a dry day, down a tunnel more than fourteen feet high". When it rains its like a torrent of water and sewage that overflows into the Thames at Blackfriars.

Eric Newby also describes a conversation with one of those that work down there that say the strangest thing they found in those underground tunnels was an iron bedstead!

An inglorious end for a river with a rich history.

World Rivers Day and time passing

2011-09-23T20:51:00.000Z

Today is the autumn equinox when days and nights are the same length. For the next six months those of us in the northern hemisphere will have longer nights than days.

Time rushes on, 24 hours every day - unless you're waiting for World River's Day (which of course you are so you can blog about it).

As you can see from the screen capture below they are using a special extra long day:

Justice and injustice

2011-09-22T12:18:00.002Z

Over at Rowing for Pleasure Chris has pointed out an injustice in the Great River Race that hurt the chances of boat 14, Kingfisher (above).

They rowed so fast they got to the Richmond half-tide lock early - or at least before the PLA was prepared to open the gates and let them continue up river. That delay of 4.5 minutes was likely critical in them losing several places and was unjust.

Justice is not an abstract concept. For example for those doing jury service it is absolutely real and concrete, a life changed by the choice between guilty or not guilty.

And justice is almost always topical, and one particular injustice is in the headlines at the moment. It was for that reason that I added a number to the picture above to make 194 rather than 14.

For an explanation as why 194, follow this link.

Sea pictures

2011-09-21T19:45:00.000Z

If you like photos of the sea check out a selection from this new book over at the Telegraph.

Flemish Coil Google Piracy Shock!

2011-09-19T07:39:00.001Z

Aha me-hearties, 'tis talk like a pirate day, so it be.

'pon my eyes, what dastardly deed to I see upon yon Google? Aye, 'tis the terror of the seas, Tillerman of the brig Laser, who has captured O'Docker's pride and joy.

What it be, you ask? Ah-ha heave-to and not be putting on t'gallants when there's a gale blowing.

Cast your spyglass on yonder Google images search for flemish coils. Ah, me hearties, we don't do them on a pirate ship, but I digress. 'tis the 2nd highest flemish coil of all and it be O'Docker's picture, aye, that it be. But it be a link to Captain Tillerman's web page!!

'tis piracy! Tillerman has high-jacked O'Docker's picture for his own blog!!

Ah-ha, 'tis enough of yon talk of blogs and Google. Where be the wenches and the grog? Me knows not but must go now or will be forced to walk the plank!

Beware the blogger pirates!!

A very wet Great River Race

2011-09-17T16:52:00.000Z

Today was the Great River Race, and it was definitely a day for umbrellas, and as can be seen from the photo above.

The GRR involves around 300 rowing boats of all types and sizes racing up the Thames from Docklands to Richmond, a total of 21 miles. Even with the tide with them, that is one long row, and if it rains a very wet row:

A big Huzzah! Hurrah! to Chris and all the Langstone Cutters on Gladys seen here pulling well through Putney:

Looking forward to hearing how well they did.

Evening on the river

2011-09-16T20:17:00.000Z

Its is one of my favourite times of year to go for an evening paddle.

You get that transition from day to sunset, dusk, twilight and finally night, and the waters go from brown to mirrored sky blue to black. While you need lights the water and air is warm enough for shorts and a t-shirt.

But the nights are drawing in and how many more evenings like this will we have?

Picture quiz

2011-09-14T18:57:00.001Z

We haven't had a picture puzzle for a bit so here's one for you while Tillerman is away.

This lovely classic yacht should be known to at least some of you, so:
1) Who owned her?
2) What is her name?
3) For what voyage is she famous?

Bonus point for naming the kitten.

Cartwheeling in Plymouth

2011-09-13T19:34:00.000Z

This week the America's Cup World Series has returned to blighty with lots of boats pranging themselves. Sometimes nose first, other occasions sideways and once apparently a full cartwheel, but always wet and probably painful.

But you probably knew that, so on to the blog bit.

Firstly a public service announcement: I'm not going. Partially its a long way to go to see one race - even if it would be in the "natural amphitheatre" of Plymouth Sound (ha! - take that San Fran) - but mostly because I've arranged to visit my godson for his birthday instead. But thanks to the interweb I can watch the races on YouTube, which brings me to:

I know there was a certain amount of.... hmmm.... how shall I put it....oh yes - pure Buff Staysail about this blog's reaction to the AC TV show. However if you look at the America's Cup YouTube channel the video from the last week with the most views is called The Plymouth Capsize Club and yup I couldn't stop myself watching it too.

Seems like a lot of people like a sailing sugar-rush

Swimmer survives the Thames

2011-09-12T19:51:00.000Z

Yup, comedian David Williams successfully made it 140 miles down the Thames despite the yucky water and in the process raised one million pounds for charity.

And a side benefit has been to highlight why London really really needs that super-sewer - for example Mayor Boris in today's Telegraph.

Until its built I'd be reluctant to swim in a week in which the Bubbler has been out.

On the Thames barge Lady Daphne

2011-09-11T19:32:00.003Z

Today as part of the Thames Festival I went on a trip down to Greenwich on the Thames barge Lady Daphne.

Ok it was just a potter as guest while motoring but how could it not be fun to be on a real Thames Barge on a sunny day going through Tower Bridge (above) as they raised the bridge for us.

Lady Daphne was sprightly for her 88 years, turning nimbly in the busy Pool of London even with the river in full flood. There was the odd shower on the way down to Greenwich (below) as can be guessed from the grey sky:

But the sun was back out in time for our return to The Tower:

You can charter the Lady Daphne for a party but the Thames Festival is the only chance to go on her as an individual.

I would have liked to have seen her under sail but then you can't have everything. If we had even a short sail I'd have wanted to race her and then win and then next thing you know you're building 70 foot carbon fibre wing-sail boats and hiring lawyers with experience in the America's Cup.

Apparently she does race (I asked) and last year did "not bad" (see post on classics for translation) but this year was less successful.

A lovely boat it was a pleasure to sail on her and its great to see her back where she belongs: on the Thames in the Pool of London.

Thames Water advises against Thames water

2011-09-10T22:06:00.001Z

The water company for London, Thames Water, is advising comedian David Williams to cut short his swim along the length of the river.

He is approaching the tidal Thames which has recently received 500,000 cubic metres of raw sewage thanks to heavy rain overflowing a system designed for Victorian England.

Hmmm.... not sure I'm really selling the capital as a great eco-friendly city. Honestly, London is one of the - if not the - greenest city around and the Thames is thriving.

However I must admit that at times of overflow the Thames only is kept oxygenated due to repeated injections by a fleet of Bubblers (above). Come on - just build that super-sewer already!

See more here on a highly scientific experiment to discover how clean Thames water really is.

Comedian finds Thames water no joke

2011-09-08T20:44:00.002Z

Comedian David Williams is attempting to swim 140 miles down the River Thames from Lechlade in Gloucestershire to Big Ben in London to raise money for charity.

It is not going well, with the actor from Little Britain (to be honest not one of my favourite shows) suffering from "severe vomiting and diarrhoea". Apparently he swallowed something while swimming that disagreed within him.

Oh dear, not exactly the five star water quality we hope for, and this is before he gets to the tidal Thames (as above, at Putney) which receives millions of tons of sewage a year.

Someone should warn him that a pair of Thames Bubblers have been patrolling the waters today doing their fzzzzzzz!!!! routine as they squirt oxygen into the water.

But its for a good cause: David Williams has raised £ 350,000 for sports aid so far and has just reached Berkshire.

Oh do keep up

2011-09-06T21:09:00.003Z

I'm being squeezed time-wise at the moment between work, family chores and the second re-write of that novel so struggling a bit on the blogging front.

However I liked Tillerman's idea to post the best of September and coming up this month we have the Thames Festival then the Great River Race on the 17th, Talk Like a Pirate Day on the 19th followed on the 25th by World Rivers Day.

That's saying nothing about a writing challenge or a directing challenge which will probably drop off the to do list (sorry).

But not tonight.... its been a very wet and blustery day and the nights are getting noticeably longer.

The Bonnie Boat

2011-09-05T19:17:00.000Z

No, not Bonnie's boat, and actually in Gaelic it should be Bàta Brèagha.

This eye catching yacht has been covered with 60,000 mirrors as part of an art project called the Bonnie Boat which will be held on the island of Skye on the 10th September. The boat is called the Celeste and is inspired by the 1960s pirate station Radio Caroline.

The event program can be found here and the artist's web site here. Its one of those that uses the word "space" a lot.

The program ends with a call to "book your ticket for the ceilidh" - very tempting but alas not possible as I have family chores that day.

So I will not be following in the wake of Prince Charlie:

Speed, bonnie boat, like a bird on the wing,

Onward! the sailors cry;

Carry the lad that's born to be King

Over the sea to Skye.

London Skyride 2011

2011-09-04T12:02:00.004Z

This morning I joined 55,000 of other Londoners on the 2011 Skyride.

For those of you that haven't done one of these the Skyride involves closing the centre of London to traffic and creating a bike friendly route that passes some of the capital's top sights.

I started on Westminster Bridge (above) and after passing Big Ben it was onto the loop up to Buckingham Palace and down the Mall to Admiralty Arch. Then we went via Whitehall onto the Embankment and the main route, following the Thames to Tower Hill, before returning back to complete the circuit back on Westminster Bridge.

It was such great fun I did the loop twice!

Many brought their own bikes in but I used one of the Boris bikes. Technically known as the TfL Barclays Cycle Hire everyone calls them after London's Mayor, here with Kelly Brook in a picture from the Standard's article on the Skyride.

Apparently super model Kelly Brook was there signing the free high visibility bibs they were handing out, but alas I didn't see her.

Boris bikes are a great idea: dotted all over central London are docking stations where you can hire bikes for short periods of time and then return them to any other docking station. If you have registered you just slot in a special key and are off and away in seconds, and having just signed up this seemed like an excellent way to try them out.

There was another benefit in using a Boris bike which was that the forecast was for heavy rain and hail which would have put a damper on the ride home, though in the end there was just the slightest drizzle for the shortest time.

And everyone clearly was having an absolutely great time. I don't think I've seen as many smiling people clearly enjoying themselves.

It was just brilliant.

Updated: might have been lucky with the weather as the heavens have just opened up, which is a shame for those who started the Skyride mid-day

Off to the Proms

2011-09-01T15:02:00.000Z

Earlier this week I went to one of the BBC's Promenade Concerts, known locally as the Proms. It is one of London's summer institutions and this year almost ever concert was sold out which is a good sign of health for this music festival.

Though I don't actually promenade as per student days .... those alas were many years ago

This blog is destroying civilisation!

2011-08-31T19:40:00.001Z

Today this blog welcomes (if that is the right word) the return of the columnist Glenn Beard, the man unafraid to speak his mind.

Friends, I am here because I am mad!!

I have just analysed the visitor logs for this blog and I discovered a disturbing statistic - the readers overwhelming come from freedom-fries loving countries!!

So what, I hear your lame-stream media liberal appeasers ask? Well, let me tell you another fact that will blow your mind. This blog was founded in November 2005 in the UK and then in just a few months afterwards, in fact in 2006, the UK's GDP fell below that of China!!

Co-incidence, I think not!!

This blog has no real information content and rarely involves any actual sailing or kayaking. What it does do is give a few seconds or even minutes of distraction, which leads me to the final conclusive statistic - many readers access this blog during work hours.

So you begin to see through the schemer's veil. Those commie bastards, aiming to undermine civilisation as we know it, have created a blog with no real content, but which reduces western productivity to a fatal degree.

You don't believe me? Well I had my doubts until I found this confession earlier this year: this blog is written by a Syrian lesbian!!! Ok, officially it is a denial, but we all know what that means. The fools even labelled that post as fiction!!!

(beginning to cry)

So people, I love my country, and I beg of you, if you love yours too, stop reading this right now!

The "most improved" Wandle River

2011-08-30T13:29:00.000Z

A bit of good environmental news for once. The River Wandle (above) in south west London is one of Britain's top ten "most improved" rivers, according to the Environmental Agency.

Once merely a sewer, this urban river has been turned round and is now packed with wildlife. I remember stopping when I saw a [sorry bit hopeless at species of water fowl, probably a coot or cormorant] struggling with an eel almost as long as it was.

On last year's kayak down it the water was clearly good and filled with growing things. The only slight qualification was that it was packed with litter and needed a good clear up, but even here the Wandle Trust is doing its bit (I should go along to their events too).

More background at The Guardian and The Telegraph.

The Street, Whitstable

2011-08-29T17:20:00.000Z

Yesterday I went for a walk along the sea wall at Whitstable. We usually go west but this time tried east, turning round when we reached what is called "The Street" (see iPhone photo above).

It is a nearly straight line of shingle heading almost directly out to sea, as can be seen in this Google Earth picture:

It is such a regular structure that there are some that say it's man-made, maybe created to help harvest the oyster beds as has been done since Roman times.

But according to Wikipedia it is entirely natural shingle built upon underlying clay. Some more pics here at geography.org.uk.

As you might expect such a clear navigational hazard is most definitely on the charts: