Buff gets NAKED

G'day all! Buff Staysail here, Buff by name and Buff by nature!

Have you ever woken up and had NO IDEA where you were or why?

Well that happened to ol' Buff on a sailing hol to the Caribbean recently that seems to have stirred up some fellow boaters.

I remember waking up and discovering I had a splitting headache, numb thumb and no clothes on - in a strange yacht!!

I went on deck to see where I was and what was going on, eyes sticking together and mouth dry. Jeez it was bright on deck. For quite a long time I just stood there, hands on hips, waiting for the cogs to click into place.

Jeez I felt crap. There was something I really had to do, like urgently.

Something white went drifting past. No, two things. Maybe yachts?

Jeez, never again.

Then things began to come into focus. Previously it had been Dave-boy's birthday and we'd been out painting the island red. Not a lot of what we got up to is family friendly, so just say we ended up with empty wallets having smoked or drunk anything on offer. Actually come to think of it my wallet completely vanished and there were some very odd purchases on my cards. Can't of been ol' Buff surely?

Anyhow when got back late the previous night to where we left the dinghy it had disappeared!! I thought I saw the yacht we'd chartered anchored out in the bay so got down to my birthday suit and swam for it, as did Wes. But where had Wes got to?

Then I saw him, starkers as I was, on our actual yacht - the one I was on belonged to some strangers!!! And stuck hard on my numb thumb was the ring & key to our yacht - so he'd been locked out all night!

Jeez what a mess.

So I used the dinghy the rightful owners had kindly left (must have got a water taxi ashore) and paddled cautiously over to Wes, who looked as bad as I felt.

Red eyes and red skin are not a good look.

So we had a few tinnies to ease away the pain and to be honest crashed out again.

Never again.

Don't know what happened to the two yachts we saw, they'd gone the next day. Oh, and it appeared our dinghy was still there, we'd just forgotten to look in the right place.

Doh! I suddenly remember what was urgent! I had to ring me ma to wish her happy birthday! Luckily Dave-boy had left his phone on our boat so I used it to have a good long chat with her back in Oz.

Didn't mention the reason the call was late - and don't you go telling her either!

This is Buff Staysail, fully clothed now, with Wes and Dave-boy, heading back out on the piss, over and not out - so watch out islanders!