Profit ratios and the Tudor Pull

It's a bank holiday weekend here in London, which means two things. Firstly - and by definition - its a 3 day weekend, as Monday is a public holiday. Secondly - and too predictably - the British weather has responded with cloudy skies and relentless rain.

So its a day inside with the books of B821, Financial Strategy, learning about profit ratios.

However half way through Unit 2 something caught my eye out the window, several old rowing boats, like the one in the photos above, heading downstream, with rowers dressed in some sort of costume.

Outside about a dozen similar boats were braving the elements and heading towards Westminster. A quick Google revealed it to be "The Tudor Pull" - organised by the Thames Traditional Rowing Association which, as the LPA's site puts it:

The Tudor Pull is a ceremonial event for Thames Watermen's Cutters which is organised by the Thames Traditional Rowing Association (TTRA) in May each year.

The cutters escort the Thames Royal Shallop 'Jubilant' rowed by members of the Company of Watermen and Lightermen from Hampton Court Palace to the Tower of London to deliver a 'Stela' to the Governor of the Tower for safekeeping. The 'Stela' is a piece of medieval water pipe made from a hollowed tree trunk which stands on a base of timber from the old Richmond Lock and bears the coat of arms of the Waterman's Company.

The cutters are rigged with full ceremonial canopies and flags and are rowed with four oars by fully-liveried crews. In keeping with the traditions of the Watermen's Cutters, a passenger must be carried.

I watched the fleet going by and returned to my numbers. Despite the rain I think they were having a much better afternoon than me!

10 Ways to Sell the America's Cup

On the day that Oracle BMW got knocked out of the America's Cup I watched the BBC news sport roundup. And what did I see? rugby, football, tennis, golf, and motorbikes, but no boats.

As Yachting World has also noticed, the America's Cup just isn't getting any coverage or indeed significant following. It's a shame as its one of sailing's top trophies, so what can the organisers do about it? Well apart from including a ball somewhere in the activity (don't laugh, thats clearly the common denominator in most of TV sports) how about this:

1. Make sure it's shown live. It makes a huge difference to watch recorded sailing, when you know the result, to seeing it live - and compare the figures for a football World Cup game to the replays. Make sure who ever gets the rights puts them out live (i.e. not like Sky here in the UK)

2. That means schedule the races at times convenient for broadcasters. Yes it's a bore but thats the reality of modern life

3. It also means have regular races. In the UK Formula 1 is regularly on one network on weekend afternoons, and that can build habits (and anyhow the first time half the audience will just be going "What the?")

4. Make the course shorter. The best bit is seeing the boats going round the mark raising and dropping sails and generally fighting for position. The long beat to windward in particular slooowwwsss things down. And Formula 1 has shown TV audiences are very happy watching vehicles going round and round and round and round and.....

5. Have more multi-boat races - much more exciting to see a fleet battle it out than just two.

6. Bring in cheerleaders. Just an idea.

I'd say also get more teams involved - so more countries have a local team to support - but I'm sure the organisers have been trying hard to get that already.

Of course there are also things the teams can do too:

7. Bring in the WAGS. Thats the wives and girlfriends, and it kept the UK tabloids busy all summer with their stories of shopping, clothes, drink, and general bad behaviour. At least one of the sailing WAGS should have a single out, another do a kiss and tell, and another be the subject of a reality tv show.

8. Behave badly. For heavens sake what has happened to the reputation of the sailor? In the Volvo there were all these really nice chaps spending time with their wives and being really good dads to their kids. What happened to girl in every port? Look at the England cricket team: complete failures again but Andrew Flintoff did the right thing in going out late drinking, been seen with series of girls in nightclubs, and then falling off a pedalo! Now thats the way to get a bit of attention for your sport.

9. Scandals. How about having one of the teams throw a couple of races due to a payoff from some far-Eastern betting syndicate?

10. Sinking. Why are all the boats still afloat? Surely what the America's Cup needs is a sinking or two or at least break a mast!

America out of the America's cup

Shock result yesterday when Oracle BMW was knocked out of the America's Cup by Luna Rossa (above) - or to be technical the Louis Vuitton cup.

I was surprised how pleased I was about this: maybe its yet another price the US must pay for GWB's madness.

But also its good to know that inshore yacht racing's top prize can't be bought by a billionaires' cheque book.

And as to why? Was it because confidence became over-confidence? Or were egos clashing and undermining the teamwork that is crucial for the crew to work as one?

But there's no doubt that Luna Rossa deserves its place in the final, sailing fast and well.

Cutty Sark Tragedy

This is the Cutty Sark on a happier day, welcoming Ellen back from her epic round the world record breaking journey.

But today its a smoldering wreck after a fire gutted the central area. Whether accident or deliberate either way its a tragedy.

At least a large part of the structure was not on site due to restoration work so is safe. Fingers crossed we'll yet again have a chance to visit and maybe even see this great tea clipper sail.

The American's Cup

Its been an exciting week at the American's Cup where hot favourites Oracle have found themselves on the point of being knocked out by those swarve Italians on Prada (above).

I haven't been following the Cup that closely to three reasons.

Firstly the TV coverage is restricted to pay channels such as Sky Sports and I'm not going to pay 34 pounds a month to a channel owned by Bush and Sharon supporter Rupert Murdoch just to watch one sailing race.

Secondly as an inshore round the cans race there is no opportunity to try and second guess the navigators and their tactics using the likes of the Stormsurf global wind forecasts. So it's a bit of a passive spectator look what happened role.

And finally there is of course no British entry!

Despite all that very tempted to fly down to Valencia to watch a race or two......

Sunday Mornings

It was such a lovely morning that just couldn't not go for a run along the Thames path. The sun was bright and strong but the path was cool under the shading trees, leaves freshly green.

And not surprisingly the path was packed with joggers and bikers, prams and dogs. And the river equally busy with rowing boats and support power boats (one of which got stuck in the shallows - if you ever wonder why they have on board a metal pole, the answer is they use it to push themselves off in such situations).

Now I'm back the clouds have rolled in and the temperature dropped and its time for some research. Really it should be on balance sheets as part of this course I'm doing.

But first the important question of what is the difference between Marmite and Marmite Guinness? - to which the answer is not much. The latter doesn't taste of Guinness, but is slightly less salty and creamier. Its not even in short supply as its still on sale in Putney Waitrose.

Can you guess which of the two above is spread with the original and which the Guinness variety?

Another ARC story

Thanks to Tillerman we've been sharing the stories we usually tell over a drink in the bar in the evening after the days sailing. So it wouldn't be surprising if we've been selecting them for entertainment as much as embarrassment factor.

So it might be there's a slight degree of censorship. I'm surprised there aren't more stories about mooring which gives so many opportunities for cock-ups, and with an audience standing by watching.

I remember one particular time when we were heading in to refuel, lined up, headed in, and it was when we were about 3 metres out that the three of us - each who claimed to able to skipper a yacht - noticed that no one had set even a single line. We bounced rather badly and yes I was driving.

Anyhow, time for another story from the ARC. One of our crew was mad keen on fishing and had bought a rod and line in Las Palmas. We'd only been across the start for about twenty minutes and he was itching to get a line out. And after a bit of badgering the skipper agreed.

Not a good idea, as there about 200 other boats all around us, and one decided to charge its batteries by towing a generator line, and yup, we got our fishing line tangled round it. We did the decent thing and cut our line but it must have made a bit of a mess.

Anyhow within a few days we'd lost sight of all other boats and forgot all about the incident. We made our way across the Atlantic, shredded one spinnaker and one pair of hands, and three weeks later crossed the finish line early one Sunday morning.

After beers, a shower, and a good nights sleep we went our separate ways. I shared the taxi to the airport with crew from other boats heading off to the same flight and enjoyed hearing their stories.

One in particular caught my attention. "We had just left Las Palmas and was towing our generator" said someone, "and you wouldn't believe it, it got caught up in the fishing line from some idiot's boat!"

"No way!"

(my small voice from the back) "Er, that was us. Sorry"

The Midnight Shredder

Tillerman has challenged us to report our worst mistake or most embarrassing moment while sailing.

Cracking idea.....

Now was it when I crash gybed a yacht in front of a rapidly on-coming Greek ferry? (nope, just learning then, doesn't count)

Or was it on the round the island race when our navigator got so sea sick he got stuck in the cabin unable to undo the lock to get out and then missed two buoys? (nope, wasn't me, so again doesn't count).

Or broaching a brand new yacht in the Solent with an inexperienced crew including some single women who for some reason didn't want to talk to me afterwards? (nope, probably some other reason for that).

So must be the case of the midnight shredder. I was onboard Boss's Ocean Wanderer with 5 others crossing the Atlantic on the Arc - gosh, back in 2003 - and we were only about 3 days out of St Lucia.

We were feeling pretty good - even confident - which can be very dangerous. We'd had a bad accident with the spinnaker halyard shredding one crew members hands to bits the previous week but since then moral had improved and we'd just done the spinnaker gybe so one watch could go below.

It was so nice on deck the off-watch remained to chat. The air was warm and the full moon rising high in the tropical night. I was at the wheel as we headed deep downwind, and we were exchanging jokes.

My attention slipped (it must have been a good joke), just for a second. And the spinnaker wrapped itself round the forestay, and kept wrapping round and round and round.

At first we were pretty relaxed - we'd had several wrap and a bit of heading into wind, pulling on the sheets and they had generally come free. This one just kept on getting worse.

The skipper and mate went forward to have a look and were baffled: the top half was wrapped one way the bottom half the other. They tried all sorts of tricks from unwinding manually (no good, which ever way they went the other half just got worse) to letting the kite fly (no good, it acted, er, like a kite, and was caught by the wind, at one point streaming horizontal. It looked rather beautiful lit up by the moon).

Then it started to shred. Boss are well known for accounting for each paper-clip, so loss of a whole spinnaker wasn't going to look good. This had to be stopped and fast - someone had to fix it. And that meant going up the mast and coming down along the forestay, unwrapping it as you went. So I volunteered.

Thing was, I was feeling really guilty. Yes, spinnakers do wrap, but I had let my concentration slip, and had been on the wheel at the time. So I got prepared and the bo'sun's chair was attached to one of the spare halyards.

Just as we were about to start the hoist the mate managed to unwrap the wayward sail. Maybe all the flying horizontal had ironed out some of the coils, but now the end was clearly in sight and soon the sail was done on the deck where the damage could be inspected. So I didn't have to go up the mast.

It was really really disappointing. I don't mind heights that much and going up the mast would have felt like balancing the mistake. And then there would have been the bragging rights "yeh, I've been up the mast, middle of the night too, it was nothing really".

But mostly can you imagine what it would have been like with the moonlight glittering off the waves and the mast swaying gently under the rolling waves that follow the trade wind from Africa?

It taught me to focus when on that point of sail - on all the information available, from the feel of the motion under foot to the sound of wind and sail. Since then (touching wood) haven't had another problem. Indeed during the Fastnet I helmed the most during our watches when the spinnaker was up - in particular at night.

Because the important thing about mistakes is they are the best of all learning experiences and if you don't get them you'll never really be able to sail.

Thames litter and paths

A series of hiccups have stopped posting for the last week. First there was the bug (or to use colloquial English, the lurgy) then work and travel then finally my broadband went out again - the second time in a month.

Even more annoying than BT's inability to provide what should be pretty basic technology for the 21st century is their use of call centres in countries where English is a second language and the over-reliance on robot like scripts. Grrr!

Anyhow the local engineer has now replaced both the line to the exchange and the equipment at the exchange so its all spanking brand new, and, at least for the time being, working.

So two river updates:

1. Rubbish: apparently there is a charity that helps clean up the litter along the Thames - see the Thames21 web site here.

2. Pathway: there is this great web site that describes the Thames paths and how they go 184 miles from the Cotswold above Oxford to Greenwich and the sea. As well as an interactive map they have a great set of downloadable walking ("hiking") maps from which the figure above was taken.

Can't wait to get a bike and head upstream to see how far I get!

Bottle and Boat

There was a report on the BBC web site that litter on Britain's beaches is up 90%. As the Thames outside my window is tidal then technically this counts as part of the coast and yes litter seems up here too.

Drifting by seems to be everything from footballs to plastic bags and from half submerged boats to used drinks bottles (above). When walking along the river side I did consider picking some bits up but there was just too too much.

The Port of London Authority removes larger items - such as this morning they dragged what looked like a whole tree out of the shipping lanes, but is anyone responsible for litter cleanup?

The tidal nature means the same bit of rubbish can go back and forth many times (anyone know how many times?) though today when its neaps the flow was, to say the least, sluggish.

Luckily my lurgy is going so unlike Father Thames I am feeling back in the flow.

Zong Video

Just uploaded this video of the Zong to YouTube - though doing so started wondering about the name Zong.

Sounds like he was Ming the Merciless's sidekick: all hail Zong the Zuton!

Running and Walking by the River

Its London Marathon day today and the sky is blue and the sun shining and a record 35,500 runners are out there pounding the streets. Best wishes to all, especially Tillerman!

Alas due to the lurgy remaining I'll not even be doing my Sunday morning 45 minute run here in Putney. But you don't have to run to enjoy the Thames path - one of my favourite walks and top tips for visitors is to go from Westminster to London Bridge (or even Tower Bridge) along the South Bank.

This area has been transformed over the past decade, and along the way you can pass:
- Big Ben
- London Aquarium
- Saatchi Gallary
- London Eye
- South Bank Arts Complex
- Second hand book stalls
- Oxo Tower Restaurant
- Tate Modern
- Millennium Bridge across to St Pauls
- Shakespeare's Globe
- Replica of the Goldern Hinde
- Southwark Cathedral
- London Bridge across to the Monument (of the great fire)
- HMS Belfast
- Tower Bridge across to the Tower of London

...to name but a few! Its a lovely walk and the views over the city (and indeed over The City) are amazing, day or night.

Last time I went that way (on route to the Zong) I popped into the Tate Modern and went on the Slides before they were dismantled. Very fast, a bit bumpy, and great fun!

One day before the mast

I've been stuck at home all week with a bug - its not been much fun. But there are many much much worse places to be sick, and the previous week I visited one.

It was a replica of the ship Zong that was moored in the pool of London for two weeks and I went along to have a look round. The story is pretty shocking - not just was it a slaver, but the centre of an insurance scam that resulting in slaves being thown overboard mid Atlantic when they got sick.

While it was pretty interesting there were two things that bothered me a bit.

Firstly it wasn't a true replica of the ship Zong - which was longer and had different layout below deck. It was just the ship used in the recent film "Amazing Grace" about the life of William Wilberforce.

Secondly the attitude of the tour guide and at least one of the others on the tour I found disquieting. Both mentioned skin colour as if that would or should be crucial in determining attitudes to the boat. "Why are you here, as a white person?" was a flavour of the questions.

I found this boggling to be honest. Slavery is a horror of humanities past, irrespective of what race you are. I don't feel I should feel guilty for what was done centuries ago by someone else for the irrelevance that we share a skin colour.

Its not just that some white people opposed slavery, and that some black people were part of slave trading. We are all mongrels and it doesn't feel right to define our identity or be defined from just one historical group.

So to a degree I switched off and started asking about the rigging, going to the rail and asking what each of the ropes were. Recently I've have been reading "Two years before the mast" which at times is quite technical in its description of the rigging of a tall ship, so a hands on Q&A session seemed just what the doctored ordered.

I found a trainee who was initially nervous but then by the end had her confidence boosted as she found she did know all the ropes, their names, and their uses.

On the tube home there was the usual cross section of races, religions, and nationalities. As a little girl staggered her way across the isle I exchanged smiles with the proud grandfather sitting opposite.

No doubt we could have exchanged national histories, found differences and reasons for grievances. Would that really have helped?

Boat Races

Tillerman asked the very good question as to why the Oxford & Cambridge Boat Race is called "The Boat Race" when there are so many races involving boats out there.

While trying to find out why (a quick look on Wikipedia) I noticed the date of the first race - back in 1829! So it pre-dates the America's Cup, which started in 1852, by a good 23 years. And the America's Cup is described as "oldest active trophy in international sport".

So thats 23 years in which it could really call itself, "The" Boat Race.

But now there are so many races involving boats - like the one in the photo above. All weekend a steady stream of canoes have been heading downstream like beetles on a pond.

Another quick Google and the answer came here. Its the Devizes to Westminster Race, a daunting 125 miles of river. It calls itself "The longest non-stop canoe marathon in the world".

There are two categories - the first full-on don't stop till you get there is for senior doubles, who paddle all through the night. And the second for juniors and single seniors taking four days and resting / camping on the way.

Thats an impressive distance to canoe: congratulations to all that made it!

The Boat Race

It was boat race day yesterday.

It was a lovely sunny spring day and the start, just round the corner from where I live, was absolutely packed. Putney Bridge and both banks heaved with not just thousands but probably hundreds of thousands.

Its amazing that a university level two contestant race for a minority sport that takes less than 20 minutes can bring so many out to watch. Ok, some will be students or ex-students. I was standing by what looked like recent graduates shouting support for my old uni, Cambridge, which made me feel at home.

I think its the combination of tradition with the competitiveness and closeness of the race. It really is open as to who will win. And as both crews were packed with internationals it was a fiercely fought all the way to Chiswick.

And Cambridge won!

Living by the river is wonderful....

Celebrity Yacht Race - Competition Results

There were no winners for the Celebrity Yacht Race competition, so Buff's t-shirt is safe!

The right answer is as follows:

- the winner of the last America's Cup and current defender is Alinghi

- Alinghi's founder (and frequent helm) is the Swiss billionaire Ernestor Bertarelli

- Bertarelli's wife is ex Miss UK Kirsty Roper

- As well as modelling, Ms Roper also considered a career in music

- The song "Black Coffee" was originally written for her

- It was later re-written and released by the All Saints

- It is said Ms Roper had a hand in developing the song and it relates to Bertarelli.

So now you know!


Picture from Alinghi site

Golden Balls and Boats

“Which one d’you like sweetie?” asked David Beckham.

Victoria Beckham looked at both boats carefully. “Well that one’s a Princess and got just a lovely walk-in wardrobe” she said.

“We’ll take it” David said to the sales rep, who beamed back.

“Wait a minute, let me finish. The other one is a Sun Seeker – now that sounds nice – and it’s got its own jacuzzi”

David smothered a groan and looked around at the London Boat Show. “There’s a hundred boats here, there’s got to be one for you here”.

“But you don’t understand, David, it’s got to be just right. When top international stars like us go to LA we’ve got to accessorise to show our class. I heard Paris Hilton and Britney Spears are getting a matching pair of speed-boats”

“Wish they’d get a pair of knickers”

Victoria gave David a slap. “Don’t say that – it’s those horrid paps”

“Yes, your paps are much nicer”.

Victoria smiled. “You know what I mean – look at how they were chasing that nice Kate Middleton, even after they promised they wouldn’t”.

“What-ever, you going to buy or what”

“I don’t know, does it come in pink?” she asked the sales rep, who nodded, smile fixed as if by superglue.

“Not pink, not pink again, call it Posh’s Palace, Brooklyn II, anything, just not pink”.

“It’s my boat, you get to choose the other toys”

“Yup, iPhone and all the best from the Macworld”

Victoria sniffed. “You spend too long on that Apple – who is this Michelle Manhart I found you searching for”

“You wouldn’t be interested” Beckham quickly said, “she’s a US military sort in Iraq, its international politics, very boring, not your cup of tea at all”.

“Oh”. Victoria had lost interest.

“Come on, I’ve got a meeting with the Florida Gators management team. Someone called Yvonne Decarlo or something like that.”

“Maybe not a boat” said Victoria, “but a car”.

“Now you’re talking” said David, perking up, “let’s go to the Detroit Auto Show”.

Updates

It's a slow period for sailing when the nights are long and the days cold. So for the foreseeable future this will be a once a week blog.

This week I'm trying an experiment suggested by Ken Levine on his blog - post an entry with all the top search phrases and see how it impacts the hit-rate. In this case it was to include all the terms in Google's Zeitgeist in a boating related piece of fiction.

Hope you enjoy the results.

Boat Show Round-up

So I went - but it was only just worth it. It doesn't help that the exhibition centre Excel is the edge of beyond (ok East London) and it didn't help that there was a signal failure on the Docklands Light Railway which meant a 20 min hike through the wilds of Canning Town (which is clearly a place you should leave your valuables at home before visiting).

It should be a plus that the place is so huge it feels empty, but it lessons the character and atmosphere. Maybe in an attempt to generate some excitement that many of stands went interactive, with demos of how to lay an anchor, competitions to haul up a dinghy's mainsail or grind a volvo, and a fog tunnel.

I was most interested by the America's Cup boat on display, BMW Oracle. Particularly impressive was the size of the track - understandable given the loads involved.


There wasn't enough time to look round the boats or do any shopping as was the last two hours on Thursday. But its my favourite time to go as the stands hand out free drinks and hire bands.

So many thanks to the Laser stand for the beer and music. But alas they were out budgeted by Sun Seeker(who else) who had hired a The Committments style band (below) for their stand.

Now that was fun!

But what does it say about a boat show when the best bit was the beer and the band?

What's the point of Boat Shows?

Its that time of year again. The Christmas decorations have been put away for another year and England is grey and wet, so it must be time for the London Boat Show.

But I can't get enthusiastic and wonder why bother going. It's not like the year I was thinking of buying a dinghy so had fun checking out Lasers and Toppers. It's not like the year I met up with a couple of friends in the champagne bar, nor the year another friend was exhibiting.

If I go at all it will be the late Thursday night where there seems to be an open bar at most stands. But at the moment its only 50:50.

But yes, this sailor does think a spinnaker is much like a bikini top.