Sunday, August 26, 2012

Buff to patent the "sail"

G'day all! Buff Staysail here! Buff by name and Buff by nature!

I'm on to a cracker of an idea - Buff''s going to patent the "sail"!!

I know what you're thinking: your legal mind is probably going on about "prior art" or some other bit of jargon.

What you don't realise is that patent law has changed and that way of thinking is old hat. Look at Apple - they got a patent for a grid of icons despite there being examples going all the way back to Xerox Parc days. Even I remember them in Windows 3.0's program manager!

It doesn't even matter if the idea is so simple a baby could do it! What matters is writing it down on a patent application with lots of arrows pointing to numbered bits of a figure (see above).

Once awarded I'll license it to a US company and then sue a non-US organisation, preferably one based in a country once at war with America (Was it arranged that M*A*S*H be broadcast on local TV at the same time that the jurors got home? Genius if true!)

Forget putting the consumer first, IPR is what matters and Buff wants in!

This is Buff Staysail (TM) (c) (Patent pending!) over and out!


mofos llp said...

Dear Mr Staysail, If you persist in your plans to patent "the sail" please be aware that we will oppose its approval strongly as it would be an infringement of our client A Pull Ink's existing patent for "the triangle."

Buff Staysail said...

G'day mofos llp (jeez, that's not really a catchy name now is it?)

According to my records your client has patented the rounded rectangle and sails based upon that shape, so it looks like I'm in the clear.

Keep Reaching said...

Mr. Staysail - do not be intimidated by rantings about a patent on a triangle - anyone can see that your clever invention has 2 straight sides plus a rounded side and all you will have to show is ask Mr. Pi Thagoras to demonstrate that the sum of the squares of the two straight edges is less than the square of the rounded edge and any right-minded jury will have no choice but to grant you justice.

O Docker said...

Apparently Apple's success has prompted the heirs of a Mr. Tutankhamun, of Alexandria, to claim prior rights to the arrangement of icons in a grid.

They also insist 'Tut' - as he's named in the legal briefs - created the design of the original tablet.

Moses said...

Verily Tut of Alexandria is mistaken.

It was I that brought the tablet to the world!

O Docker said...

Moses, I learn so much from reading blogs like JP's.

I never knew your differences with the Egyptians grew from an intellectual property dispute.

As a sailor, I've always been impressed with how you played the winds at the Red Sea, though.

Anonymous said...

Mr Staysail - are you related to Mr Staypuft from Ghostbusters?

Buff Staysail said...

I ain't afraid of no ghost!

Though to answer your question, no.

Anonymous said...

Very sad.
I love toasted marshmallows me.

Buff Staysail said...

Me too, so lets toast them, not me ;)