Wednesday, January 11, 2017

10 reasons why sailing is SAD

Our new top correspondent Boris Staysail has been interviewing the topest persons and has come up with this Top Trump list of 10 reasons why sailing is sad.

1. Water sports are sad. I know nothing about water sports so don't know what they are but know they are really sad

2. Colour. I've seen those Aeros that some sad sailors go on and on about but you can't get them in gold, and gold is the only not sad colour

4. All good things can be done in one of my hotels, if you can't do it in a hotel then that is SAD. And you can't sail in a hotel so that is just sad

5. One sailor I have heard of is John Kerry and he is a Democrat and they are sad so sailors are sad

6. I am the smartestish of all but haven't won the America's Cup, so it must be sad, so sad. I feel sorry for it!

7. I was told that the Vendee Globe was a big sailing race but when I went on to the web site to watch the virtual regatta I noticed they were all fake, not real - FAKE - that's sad

8. My friend Putin doesn't sail, so it must be sad

9. America is the topest nation, greatest at everything - so why didn't America get the most sailing gold medals in the Olympics - it must be that its FIXED against America. Its FIXED! We should build a wall otherwise against these SAD sailors

10. The main stream media reports about sailing and they are just garbage, so biaised, its SAD. So SAD!



4 comments:

Tillerman said...

FAKE NEWS - A TOTAL NAUTICAL WITCH HUNT

JP said...

If something is fake fake news does that make it news? Asking for a friend.... well more of an acquaintance ... really no connection

Tillerman said...

The fact that fake news is fake is not really news. But if somebody important tells somebody else important that the fake news exists then that would also be news.

But if some fake news is fake fake news then that would be interesting and unusual so that would also be news. The public deserves to understand the difference between ordinary fake news and fake fake news so that they will recognize real news if they ever see any.

JP said...

But is it fake fake news or is it a deep undercover spook operation and if so on which side? Or could it be a fake spook operation - and might that be news?